tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-351607512024-03-18T21:06:08.006-07:00The Place Where Jack Pendarvis has a "Blog"One Time I Found $220 on the GroundJack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comBlogger6160125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-43382905636164078072024-03-11T07:16:00.000-07:002024-03-12T08:45:06.759-07:00New Pinnacles of DisengagementI am sure I do not have to remind you how <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/03/its-over.html">I cared deeply about the Oscars from approximately age 10 to age 50,</a> followed by <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2013/02/even-their-virtues-were-being-burned.html">a steep decline lasting a decade or so.</a> In fact, a couple of years ago, I stopped watching the show altogether, as your research into my personal habits has no doubt affirmed already. Moreover, I did not even know that this year's Oscars were happening until 8:30 PM <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/03/the-lions-den.html">Central Time</a> on the night before the ceremony. Nevertheless, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/03/its-over.html">my sister</a> and I (she has precociously developed a similar disinclination to engage with awards season) cannot get out of the habit of trying to beat one another soundly when it comes to guessing the winners. It gives me no pleasure to say that I trounced her for the first time in many years, my victory leaving an ashy, bitter taste of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/06/going.html">irony</a> in my mouth, given that neither of us cares anymore. About anything!Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-71942796612358005882024-03-09T06:04:00.000-08:002024-03-09T06:17:42.823-08:00That Upon Which I Was SittingI was sitting on something for secret reasons that no longer require sitting. Forget about those reasons, for they are defunct. The important thing is that I fished out my COMPLETE ILLUSTRATED WORKS OF <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/03/an-unforgettable-adventure.html">LEWIS CARROLL</a> some months ago... it is still over there, in my <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/my-problems.html">home office</a>, sitting forlorn atop a box of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2019/09/lucky-peridot.html">Daily Racing Forms</a> from <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/12/blogtrospective-16-twentieth-century.html">1956</a> (long story, or maybe no story); I need to reshelve it. But that is not what I came here to tell you! Those months ago, when I fished it out for my secret reasons, I opened <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2006/11/by-gad-sir.html">ALICE'S</a> ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND with fateful randomness to a passage I had somehow never noticed before, in which we are informed via poem that "the <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/02/yes-i-have-noticed.html">Owl</a> and the <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/06/another-17th-century-thing.html">Panther</a> were sharing a pie." If you do not understand why I am telling you this, I advise you to spend the next several years studying this "blog." Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-34678586589977518122024-03-01T07:35:00.000-08:002024-03-01T07:40:36.974-08:00The Official RecordWell, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/02/skyland.html">McNeil</a> has combed through his journals and I find myself compelled to issue a clarification on earlier "blog" matters. As I am sure you will recall with crystal-clear accuracy, and without even needing to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/a-dilly.html">"click" on this "link," McNeil claimed that I had boasted to him that I had met Phyllis Diller. I denied it, as I never met Phyllis Diller. McNeil said that in that case I had been lying to him, and vowed to scour his archives for proof. I scoffed at such an attempt.</a> And yet, in a way, I was wrong. And yet, in another way, I was right. In McNeil's journal entry of November 6, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/12/blogtrospective-16-twentieth-century.html">1998</a>, he writes, "Talked to Jack this afternoon and learned that he is going to meet Phyllis Diller next week." First, please note that the meeting is to take place in the future, as far as November 6, 1998 is concerned. And it really was supposed to happen, though I had forgotten about it until McNeil's recent communication. <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/03/golf-buddy.html">My friend Ward McCarthy</a> and I were making <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2010/06/all-star-entertainment-wrap-up_25.html">a thing called "The Movie Lounge,"</a> and we had asked Phyllis Diller to comment on the Chuck Norris film INVASION USA, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/10/how-phil-spends-pandemic.html">in which she sort of appears in a particular capacity ("click" here</a> for more details. I know you won't!). At the remove of all these years, it is easy for me to imagine why she or her representatives abruptly pulled out of the scheduled appearance. Let me say, however, that although I once told McNeil that I was "going to meet" Phyllis Diller, as was supposed to be the case, I never told him that I had "met" Phyllis Diller - an event, I reiterate, that sadly did not occur after all. I cannot recall whom we got to talk about INVASION USA in Ms. Diller's stead. That is a question for Movie Lounge host <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/05/what-great-time.html">Kent Osborne.</a> In the sort of coincidence that McNeil and I both enjoy - and I hope it will bring him succor as this incident draws to its belated close - <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dicey.html">Ace Atkins</a> and I had a talk about INVASION USA on our most recent walk around <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dicey.html">the neighborhood,</a> which <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/hole-to-hole.html">my diary</a> reminds me took place on Monday, February 26 of this year. Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-11276335313125919972024-02-29T06:36:00.000-08:002024-03-04T07:55:28.067-08:00I'm Not CoolIt is my duty to report that I will be wearing giant wraparound sunglasses <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/02/in-way.html">at the event tomorrow, not an eye patch as previously predicted.</a> Please be advised that I received the giant wraparound sunglasses at the surgery center and will be wearing them under the orders of a physician. I am not trying to look "cool."Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-47376288059763406012024-02-24T07:10:00.000-08:002024-03-04T07:55:50.020-08:00In the WayHello! I will be doing a little <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/02/the-golden-obelisk.html">DJ</a> set at <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2017/06/guitar-emotions.html">The End of All of Music</a> at 3 PM local time on Friday, March 1. Chances are good that I will be wearing an eye patch for legitimate medical reasons. <a href="https://theendofallmusic.com/our-12th-anniversary-is-friday-march-1st/">"Click" here for more details</a> (about the event, not the eye patch). <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/reason.html">Remember when I quit social media?</a> That is why this will sadly have to do in the way of promotion.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-77456120071696023442024-02-21T08:05:00.000-08:002024-02-21T08:05:24.514-08:00Another Thing<a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/02/skyland.html">Another thing that Hanna and I argue about</a> is <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/12/here-comes-kicker.html">GILMORE GIRLS,</a> of course. As you can imagine, the subject of contention is a ranking of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/04/discontinued-crystal-shrimp.html">Rory's</a> boyfriends by suitability. Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-15973230420639388152024-02-19T06:22:00.000-08:002024-02-19T07:08:09.081-08:00SkylandWell, it's <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/02/street-jeers.html">Presidents' Day, and you know what that means, of course: no work for today in the animation business.</a> At least here in the USA! To <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/05/nestled-together.html">our Swedish coworker Hanna,</a> for example, Presidents' Day is nothing but an incomrpehensible travesty on the occasion of which we take away her pens and pencils. Oh, how we love to rib Hanna about Presidents' Day. And by "we," I mean "I." Anyway, one thing is for sure: now I have time to let you know about all the latest updates on the book report that <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/a-dilly.html">McNeil</a> wrote for school <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/09/a-fitting-tribute.html">45 years ago... a story the "blog" has been working to crack since 2012!</a> I've just been sitting on this hot breaking news, waiting for a time like Presidents' Day. I can keep you in suspense no longer! McNeil found his actual, original copy of the book (The Crash of 2086, you've never heard of it) in "a box in the garage crammed between a copy of the movie <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2007/10/blogtrospective-3-movies.html">EXECUTIVE SUITE</a>, and an even older book called 'Never Trust Anyone Over 13.' I paid 62 cents for the Crash book, 29 cents for the 13 book - both from The Book Rack in Skyland Shopping Center." Readers will be excited to learn that the Skyland Shopping Center in Mobile, Alabama, is also where <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/sorry-state.html">McNeil saw his first liter bottle of Coca-Cola,</a> and it made a huge impression on him, as previously reported on the "blog." We are assuming that the copy of the movie mentioned above is a <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/12/vhs-tape.html">VHS tape</a>, but clarifications or corrections will be issued as necessary.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-68928720380632653542024-02-12T06:52:00.000-08:002024-02-12T06:52:51.907-08:00Yes, I Have NoticedAs you know, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/hole-to-hole.html">every book I read has an owl in it,</a> and one such book was <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dear-diary.html">MAGPIE MURDERS by Anthony Horowitz.</a> And now another such book is the sequel, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2008/06/blogtrospective-4-moon.html">MOONFLOWER</a> MURDERS, in which he gets to the owl right away, "a rather fine owl with its wings outstretched." I had no chance to even put down the book before the owls kept coming and finally a character said, as if taunting me personally, "Actually, you may have noticed, we've put owls everywhere." He means at the hotel he owns, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2019/10/safe-owl.html">the mascot</a> of which is an owl, OR DOES HE? Authors, I am certain you will agree, have become so blatant with their owls these days, taking the fun out of it for all of us (me) who have trained themselves to find the owl in every book, thereby barely clinging to a scrap of hope for order and purpose in an otherwise bleak universe. Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-18883307194553282242024-02-03T08:19:00.000-08:002024-02-03T08:19:38.341-08:00Top ThreeLast night we discussed it thoroughly, and you will be excited to hear that <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dicey.html">Dr. Theresa</a> and I agree about which three movie lines we most often say to each other around the house on various humorous occasions, and they never get old! In the number three spot, we have <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/03/freaking-out-with-john-lithgow.html">"I know what you're going to do. It's a bad thing, and I'm going to tell."</a> For number two, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2009/04/not-like-everybody-says.html">"I'm smart! Not like everybody says."</a> Number one came as somewhat of a surprise to us, but we do say it an awful lot, and it is undeniably versatile and useful. I can keep you in suspense no longer. "Ain't nothing horrible going to happen today!" from WALK HARD takes the coveted gold medal.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-2108049254802082122024-01-28T08:17:00.000-08:002024-02-03T07:05:37.730-08:00Hole to HoleBased on contextual evidence from my precious, precious <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dear-diary.html">diary, I must have gone back to Square Books</a> on January 4th. I know this because I had lunch with <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2007/01/blogtrospective-1-tom-franklin.html">Tom Franklin</a> that day, and I never go to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/03/old-paperbacks.html">the square</a> without making some time for the bookstore. I also have noted in my diary that a young person stopped me to take my photograph that day because he liked the hat that <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/02/red-shoes.html">Katie</a> made for me. And I remember being <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/04/yesterday.html">on the sidewalk</a> at that moment, headed for Square Books. But that is not what I want to tell you about. But it is a pretty nice hat. Anyway, it must have been on January 4th - though the diary does not explicitly state as much - that I picked up RAMAYANA, the adaptation by <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2013/08/gagutz-gobaloon.html">William Buck.</a> I did so because when I saw it, I recalled the high esteem in which <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/07/here-we-are.html">Lee Durkee</a> holds William Buck. My diary goes on to tell me that I finally began reading the book early in <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dicey.html">our week of being snowed in.</a> But what I've been saving just for you is that last night I read the part where Rama is (<a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/i-didnt-know.html">spoiler alert!</a>) exiled from the city, and his <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/09/the-trembling-ghosts.html">chariot</a> driver predicts that as a result "these broad ways will be the paths where <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/06/another-17th-century-thing.html">wild cats</a> and <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dear-diary.html">owls</a> roam. Rats will crawl and cunning <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/05/reading-comprehension.html">snakes</a> will slither from hole to hole." If you ask me, the cats and owls should take care of the rats and snakes, but what do I know? In conclusion, I was once again given to wonder why <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/08/blogtrospective-9-books-with-owls-in.html">every book has an owl in it, as you can see for yourself by "clicking" here.</a> In further conclusion, allow me to share a fascinating detail not included in the diary: the young person took my photo not with his phone, but with a clunky old-time camera such as <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2018/11/regarding-plovers-eggs.html">Jimmy Olsen</a> might have used.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-46160770871709389302024-01-22T14:29:00.000-08:002024-01-23T11:47:47.051-08:00DiceyIn <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/08/important.html">our neighborhood</a>, last week's snow still sticks stubbornly to the ground, and I am not permitted to walk down our steep driveway to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/10/today-could-be-day.html">the mailbox</a>, but <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dear-diary.html">Dr. Theresa</a> somehow made it to the grocery store and back, despite road conditions that were - to use her own word in a texted response to an inquiry on the subject from <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/yes.html">Ace Atkins</a> - "dicey." Dicey and icy, I would add here, to the amusement of one and all. I was in a meeting for Season 2 of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/09/the-man-who-read-book.html">ADVENTURE TIME: FIONNA AND CAKE</a> when Dr. Theresa left the house, heedlessly embracing danger, and therefore found myself powerless to stop her! Anyway, given <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/i-didnt-know.html">the obligations of the "blog,"</a> I knew I should mention that <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/yes.html">we are no longer snowed in,</a> or so it would seem.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-10012511018684896512024-01-20T08:47:00.000-08:002024-01-20T08:47:27.198-08:00YesSome of you, if you exist, may be asking, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/reason.html">"Are you still snowed in?"</a> The answer is yes, since Sunday. <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/my-problems.html">Ace</a>, however, managed to get his truck out of the neighborhood yesterday, and he brought us back enough <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/04/blogtrospective-12-kent-eating-chicken.html">chicken thighs</a> to feed an army. Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-30821361972003154492024-01-17T09:55:00.000-08:002024-01-17T11:37:20.314-08:00Reason<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyl-Br_9qSUO2aT_QS0iBxBGz6u5-Vl6Up2YwbIZFQ7ZNhOmxMPJ-lr4OmgGqR_tOgMJhXJhOe0vHP4Yz2Eyp8nnI3qhCteI77gloD1dbwuzttDx9f524OU43H6WhTfL2JXjAdojcvky4HeNGxVHHr76FzqwkPVVaFvRXvrVLxJl2Ek4_7VhXy/s2400/thumbnail_jack%20and%20pen.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2400" data-original-width="1920" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyl-Br_9qSUO2aT_QS0iBxBGz6u5-Vl6Up2YwbIZFQ7ZNhOmxMPJ-lr4OmgGqR_tOgMJhXJhOe0vHP4Yz2Eyp8nnI3qhCteI77gloD1dbwuzttDx9f524OU43H6WhTfL2JXjAdojcvky4HeNGxVHHr76FzqwkPVVaFvRXvrVLxJl2Ek4_7VhXy/w320-h400/thumbnail_jack%20and%20pen.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><br />For no reason, here is a picture of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/rough-treatment.html">Pen</a> and me at <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/11/martha-raye-agonistes.html">Doris Day's</a> favorite French restaurant. Photo by <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/09/the-man-who-read-book.html">Megan Abbott!</a> Well, I thought of a reason: <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/sorry-state.html">I quit social media, but maybe part of my brain doesn't understand that.</a> Because this is the sort of thing that would wind up on social media. Speaking of which! <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/sorry-state.html">Remember when I quit "blogging"?</a> Well, I think there was a time when I really did. And I'll tell you what I mean. I poked around to see whether I had ever mentioned this restaurant before, and to my shock, it turns out that I didn't report my November 2019 trip to Los Angeles (when the above photo was taken) AT ALL! <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/05/nestled-together.html">Usually, I will give you a little something from my wee little jotting book in the way of travel notes that no one reads.</a> But nope! This trip was almost lost to history. Which would have been fine, honestly. But we're <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/dear-diary.html">snowed in</a> and I have nothing to do.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-46617160711083878372024-01-15T07:59:00.000-08:002024-01-15T08:00:23.283-08:00Dear DiaryDid you know I keep a handwritten diary, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/12/hoot.html">just like Brian Cox</a> and <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2013/11/more-spelling-tips-from-lord-wariston.html">Lord Wariston</a>? Diaries are the original "blog." Diaries are the original TikTok! Diaries were a TikTok you could damn well keep to yourself. Pardon my salty language! And my inaccurate understanding of what TikTok is. Anyway, my diary is how I know that it was <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/on-coffee-table.html">New Year's</a> Eve when <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/i-didnt-know.html">Dr. Theresa</a> and I went to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/funny-you-should-mention-it.html">Square Books</a> and I, uncharacteristically, could not find anything I wanted to drop my money on. Dr. Theresa, however, came away with three juicy mystery novels, one of which I idly picked up and really got into. Now we are entering territory that was not explored in the diary. Exclusive content! So I was like, "This book is called <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/05/rabelaisian.html">MAGPIE</a> MURDERS. It is really heavy on the magpies! There are magpies everywhere you look in this thing. There is NO WAY this author is going to give me magpies AND <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2024/01/on-coffee-table.html">owls!" ("Click" here</a> to begin a years-long journey that will slowly and poorly deepen your knowledge of my interest in the matter.) Anyway, last night we were reading in bed as outside the snow was falling on the ground and I was suddenly presented with this fact by the narrator of MAGPIE MURDERS: "A <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/02/the-victorian-match-industry.html">nineteenth-century</a> naturalist named Thomas Blakiston had an owl named after him."Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-21890981023514060392024-01-08T08:15:00.000-08:002024-01-08T08:15:12.851-08:00I Didn't KnowYesterday, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/mcneil-month-by-month.html">Dr. Theresa</a> and I were watching the movie I, FRANKENSTEIN for reasons your frail human mind could never understand, and neither could ours. The following may contain at least one <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/03/coda.html">spoiler</a> for the movie I, FRANKENSTEIN, which came out 10 years ago, though it feels like it came out 200 years ago, in a different universe. Anyway! At one point, a skeptical modern-day scientist gets hold of Dr. Frankenstein's notebook, and opens it, and says with delight, "Oh! He used electric eels!" Because before that, she didn't believe Dr. Frankenstein would have access to electricity. Now that she has read about the electric eels, she believes in <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/12/sandwich-and-alexander.html">Dr. Frankenstein,</a> like he's <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/12/santas-face.html">Santa Claus!</a> Well, that caused me to ask Dr. Theresa aloud, "What's the deal with electric eels anyway?" Before she could answer, I screamed in excitement, "Oh, yeah! I have a whole book about electric eels!" (<a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/06/wonderland-of-weeds.html">See also.</a>) I was referring, of course, to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/12/blogtrospective-16-twentieth-century.html">ELECTRIC EEL CALLING</a>, lavishly illustrated by its author. Off I scampered to the bookshelf, which happened to be in the very room where we were watching I, FRANKENSTEIN, to retrieve my copy of ELECTRIC EEL CALLING. It was published in 1941, and I acquired it <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2009/10/my-tainted-motives.html">circa 2009</a>, and I finally had a reason to open it. One thing I read was the author's contention that the people of South America were "the first humans in all the world to find [electricity] in a palpable form, and although the Egyptians are credited with the earliest observation of electric fish (the electric <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/bear-with-me.html">catfish</a> of the Nile)"... wait! Let's just stop the sentence right there. I interrupted I, FRANKENSTEIN to yell towards Dr. Theresa all manner of questions about the electric catfish, such as, did she know about it? She lived in Egypt for a number of years. I, myself, had reached the age of 60 (I started this "blog" as a wee, apple-cheeked lad of only 43... my God! What a nightmare), and had just discovered, for the first time, in this old book, the existence of the electric catfish of the Nile, which I assume everyone else reading this (there is no one reading this) knew about already. I'm always late to the party. However, due to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/07/here-we-are.html">my strict policy of "blogging" about things that remind me of other things I have "blogged" about before,</a> I thought I should publicly acknowledge these electric catfish, as <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/06/catfish-of-ancient-egypt.html">the catfish of ancient Egypt have previously appeared in this space,</a> though I was shamefully ignorant at the time of their electrical talents. In conclusion, if you do not "click" on the "links," you are really missing the point of the "blog," which is nothing less than a vast, oddly constructed historical novel meant to be read <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2017/12/waiting-for-stuffy.html">Julio Cortazar style!</a> That's what I'm telling myself these days.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-22248744429894069762024-01-02T06:47:00.000-08:002024-01-02T07:02:38.302-08:00On the Coffee TableOur <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2017/11/the-money-store.html">old house</a> didn't have a <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/06/my-fondest-dream-came-true.html">coffee table</a> but our <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/09/a-man-of-song.html">new one</a> (is it still new?) does. Most often, I sit in <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/04/fun-at-home.html">my favorite chair,</a> which does not have direct access to the coffee table. But yesterday, I was on the couch, and I reached down and picked up a "coffee table book" - to be precise, a book of photographs by the artist who called herself "Madame Yevonde." Well, it so turns out that one of Madame Yevonde's models was all done up as Minerva, in a shiny metal hat and holding a menacing <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/12/book-report.html">revolver</a>, and <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/07/glanced-down-and-saw-owl.html">you know what that means!</a> Yes, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/i-was-right.html">an owl</a> was sitting there with her, like, "What's up?" Make it YOUR <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2013/12/tropical-piano-tuner.html">new year's</a> resolution to figure out why <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/08/blogtrospective-9-books-with-owls-in.html">I tell you every time I read a book with an owl in it.</a>Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-15197028847598238152023-12-24T18:56:00.000-08:002023-12-24T18:56:44.945-08:00I Was RightI read a book in a single day. I can't remember the last time I did that. It was Jeanette Winterson's new book of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/rough-treatment.html">ghost</a> stories, and so it made perfect reading for <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/04/by-greenwood-side.html">Christmas Eve.</a> I said to myself when I opened it, "<a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/sorry-state.html">This book is going to have an owl in it</a>," and I was right.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-66335090386850065502023-12-22T06:44:00.000-08:002023-12-22T06:44:31.878-08:00Narrative ImplicationsThe <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/04/yesterday.html">doctor</a> is making me exercise, so I made myself a little exercise playlist to which I can march around like a big strong he-man. One of the selections on my playlist is "<a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/12/hoot.html">Hollywood</a> Swinging" by <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2012/08/the-tall-tree.html">Kool & the Gang.</a> Never before have I paid such attention to the lyrics as I have while my body marches around, leaving my mind a total blank, except for the song lyrics imprinting themselves on my smooth, round brain. Imagine my astonishment when I heard Kool & the Gang singing (I may be paraphrasing a little, but I don't think so) "I remember not too long ago, I went to the theater and saw a Kool & the Gang show." I was immediately reminded of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/01/infinite-truck-drivers.html">the narrative implications of the song "Truck Driving Man" ("click" here for vital details),</a> as well as the reality-bending musical choices in the films <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/07/a-thing-i-noticed.html">EVERY WHICH WAY BUT LOOSE, G. I. BLUES, and DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN (once again, please "click" here for deeper insights).</a>Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-3787367559367019362023-12-15T12:25:00.000-08:002023-12-15T12:25:24.927-08:00A DillyIn the course of everyday email communications, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/12/sorry-state.html">McNeil</a> happened to mention that he was under the impression I had once met <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/06/his-friend.html">Phyllis Diller.</a> I was sad to tell him that he was mistaken. In response, McNeil wrote, "You lied to me." His implication was that I had previously misled him with some sort of fanciful prevarication detailing a purely imaginary meeting with Phyllis Diller. I replied that there was no way I would ever lie to him about such a thing. I am sure I have never claimed to McNeil, or to anyone else, that I ever had the pleasure of meeting Phyllis Diller. McNeil is now digging through his vast archives, hoping to uncover evidence to the contrary, which, I assure you, does not exist.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-62113147862081594412023-12-05T07:21:00.000-08:002023-12-05T07:21:10.160-08:00Rough Treatment<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdFRXHtk_2_Vld7KC49noxmOiy9nvrVISC8Bvmy4xp-bFqZITF1AcOI2gSNIcvWyvnVJ7l83rJ4bMZm2eoox612m5NIa2JEXQX3QonSzIwsaSIFCvAIcCbwo76C2jH-B9JXJdG6dwBbX4E8mEZrblWdRjl_NJDp7H8hpGxhWKH67U-pp8ysJTc/s843/Screen%20Shot%202023-12-05%20at%209.18.54%20AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="562" data-original-width="843" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdFRXHtk_2_Vld7KC49noxmOiy9nvrVISC8Bvmy4xp-bFqZITF1AcOI2gSNIcvWyvnVJ7l83rJ4bMZm2eoox612m5NIa2JEXQX3QonSzIwsaSIFCvAIcCbwo76C2jH-B9JXJdG6dwBbX4E8mEZrblWdRjl_NJDp7H8hpGxhWKH67U-pp8ysJTc/w400-h266/Screen%20Shot%202023-12-05%20at%209.18.54%20AM.png" width="400" /></a></div><br />I see that the <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2018/11/pen-runs-over-bottle.html">Willy Wonka</a> prequel is coming out next week, which reminds me that <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/01/i-watched-hot-dog-being-built.html">Pendleton Ward</a> and I were asked to provide a rough treatment for what we might do with that very story. We wrote the treatment, but we never got paid... in fact, as I recall, we were more or less <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/09/the-man-who-read-book.html">ghosted</a>... talk about rough treatment! But when I saw an ad for the movie, I started laughing, thinking about some of our funny ideas. Our prequel starts out as a sequel. Willy Wonka has handed over the factory to Charlie Bucket and blasted off to live his new life on the surface of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/09/color-accuracy.html">the sun.</a> I can't remember why! Anyway, Charlie has a philosophy that is the opposite of Wonka's: he throws open the doors to the factory and kids just swarm everywhere, eating everything in sight. Until! They discover a wall made of everlasting gobstobbers, behind which is entombed Wonka's most shocking and deadly secret. Charlie really wants to find out what's behind the wall. Hundreds of kids lick at it for hours, to no avail. Finally... and this is the part that I wanted to tell you... FINALLY! Charlie enlists a character named "Young Jaws." This is what I'm so happy about. Jaws is the villain from a couple of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/03/spy-sandwich.html">James Bond</a> movies... you remember his big silver chompers! Maybe I'll attach a photo, which I hardly ever do anymore. Anyway, "Young Jaws" is him as a child, ha ha, that's right, our Willy Wonka prequel is also a prequel to <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2008/06/blogtrospective-4-moon.html">MOONRAKER!</a> As I was saying, Young Jaws is enlisted to bite through the wall of everlasting gobstobbers. Then some other stuff happens that leads to the prequel.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-34916311704698969432023-12-02T07:06:00.000-08:002023-12-02T07:10:12.954-08:00Sorry StateIt's the time of year when we come together and assess the state of the "blog." Isn't it? Well, it should be! Look. As you know, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/soup-story.html">I stopped "blogging" in 2016</a> because I got depressed <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/11/not-publishing.html">the day our TV blew up.</a> Year after year, the number of "posts" decreased, satisfyingly, though the "blog" continued to function on a minimalist level, due to routine maintenance requirements, such as <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/08/blogtrospective-9-books-with-owls-in.html">telling you every time I read a book with an owl in it.</a> Then, of course, our lives were altered by <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/06/going.html">a famous pandemic,</a> and I was called on by a grateful nation to start "blogging" again to cheer up the world, resulting in the first increase in "blogging" activity since our TV began to smoke during a viewing of <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/mcneil-month-by-month.html">Bob Hope</a> in <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/he-probably-took-nap.html">I'LL TAKE SWEDEN.</a> After those heady times, whatever that means, of 2020, the "blog" began to sink back into the mire, where it belonged. That is why it is so sad to report that after a second, post-pandemic pattern of steady decline, the number of "posts" unexpectedly went up this year, defying the predictions of our greatest scientists and thinkers. What is to blame for this disheartening development? We cannot say it is only because <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/the-smiling-accusation.html">I encountered a record-breaking (?) FIVE books with owls in them in November alone.</a> For who can forget <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/bear-with-me.html">the owl drought</a> that preceded such bounty? No, it's all because <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/07/here-we-are.html">I quit social media</a> in late 2022. Unless this is social media. Is this social media? In short, my fingers had grown too used to typing and could not be stopped. For the record, we reached the tipping point during <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/soup-story.html">McNeil's</a> reflection on <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/so-much-coke.html">the first time he saw a liter bottle of Coca-Cola.</a>Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-36566811829834653022023-11-28T07:23:00.000-08:002023-11-28T07:23:07.201-08:00The Smiling AccusationLook, I've fulfilled my duty 100% by telling you about <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/my-problems.html">the character in THE SCARLET RUSE by John D. MacDonald who says "I look like a big goggly owl."</a> Yes, a subsequent <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/sooner-than-i-expected.html">owl</a> has appeared in the text, but our contract states that <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/01/happy-new-year.html">I am under no obligation to tell you about it.</a> HOWEVER! It's the same character talking about owls again. This time, she is with <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/09/mcneil-and-mcgee.html">Travis McGee's sidekick,</a> who she says is "smiling at me like some kind of owl." She must have owls on the brain. Unlike me. NOW! Over the years, we have collected here <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/08/blogtrospective-9-books-with-owls-in.html">quite a trove of owl imagery,</a> and owls have been accused of a lot of weird things by authors of varying insight and ability, but as I search the files, I cannot find a previous example in our catalog of anyone ever thinking of an owl as smiling. I am ready to be corrected! In any case, you can see why I had to attach this footnote. We are constantly making new discoveries in the area of literary owl usage.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-38470092951272614212023-11-27T13:41:00.000-08:002023-11-27T13:41:05.691-08:00Sooner Than I ExpectedWell, given that Barbra Streisand was in a movie called <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2022/06/his-friend.html">THE OWL AND THE PUSSYCAT (not to be confused with the poem of the same name),</a> I sort of knew that her autobiography would have <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/the-sleep-of-swamp-thing.html">an owl in it.</a> It's so incredibly long, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/my-problems.html">the book is</a>, that it probably has everything in it! Something on her <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/10/lynda-barrys-honeymoon.html">honeymoon</a> with <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2012/06/some-orange-cat.html">Elliott Gould</a> reminds her (here, far in the future) of her movie THE OWL AND THE PUSSYCAT. To be clear, the movie came out many years after her honeymoon with Elliott Gould, so I was not expecting that particular owl to appear so soon. But I knew it was coming! Some day I'll remember why <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2011/08/blogtrospective-9-books-with-owls-in.html">I tell you every time I read a book with an owl in it.</a> Was I proving a point?Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-56214708100408584322023-11-26T12:14:00.000-08:002023-11-26T12:14:00.592-08:00The Sleep of Swamp ThingSomeone (I hesitate to say who or why, though the details are interesting!) kindly made a present to me of the complete <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/07/chad-bad-in-rad-pad.html">SWAMP THING</a> comic books by <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2013/05/this-is-normal.html">Alan Moore.</a> So, I was going through those, and what do you know? <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2013/06/the-tough-figure-inside.html">Jason Blood came to town. You may know him better as the superhero/demon called, fittingly enough, "The Demon."</a> Well, first thing he does is stop at the local freaky magic occult shop and pick up a copy of Goya's "The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters" to hang on the wall in his <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2010/07/free-books.html">bachelor pad.</a> (Sometimes translated as "The Dream of Reason Produces Monsters"... either way, whatever it is is producing monsters.) So I'm squinting at this piece of art as represented in this here comic book... let me tell you something. <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/01/a-tiny-owl.html">I stopped reading comic books when they still cost 25 cents.</a> Now, later on, in the <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2015/11/unemployment.html">1980s,</a> for example, when these SWAMP THING comics by Alan Moore came out, well, they really started cramming a lot of visual information on a page. Too much, I say. It's kind of taxing! So I'm squinting at this postage-stamp-sized fragment of "The Sleep of Reason" on this chaotic field of shape and color and I'm like, that's an <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/my-problems.html">owl, right? Because, if so, that's very important to me.</a> So I had to look up the real thing on the "internet" just to make sure, and then I looked back at the comic book panel for comparison, and yes, okay, that was an owl I was looking at.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35160751.post-29427596304986695912023-11-22T07:27:00.000-08:002023-11-22T07:27:44.852-08:00My ProblemsLet me tell you about my problems. I went to visit <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/mcneil-month-by-month.html">my parents.</a> That's not a problem! But practically as I was walking out the door, I realized I had not brought a book to read. Now, I didn't want to bring <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/funny-you-should-mention-it.html">this Lydia Davis book</a>, because I was almost finished with it, and I didn't want to finish it down there on <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2021/01/famous-fiery-skull-head.html">the Gulf Coast</a> and be sitting around with nothing to read. Nor did I wish to bring the next entry in <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/funny-you-should-mention-it.html">the 2-person book club,</a> because it is a real whopper, almost exactly as long as the unabridged <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/05/blogtrospective-18-anatomy-of-melancholy.html">ANATOMY OF MELANCHOLY.</a> So I kind of glanced along a shelf in my <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/06/watching-guy-type.html">home office</a> and saw a brittle, used <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/mcneil-month-by-month.html">Travis McGee</a> mass-market <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/03/old-paperbacks.html">paperback</a> I purchased for money in 2014 but never read because even <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/mcneil-month-by-month.html">Ace Atkins</a>, the world's biggest Travis McGee fan, had <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/07/so-dry-as-to-be-cryptic.html">described it to me in what I took to be unflattering terms.</a> And I have a lot of misgivings about Travis McGee to begin with! But somehow it seemed like the perfect thing to take on my trip. So a character in the book describes herself in the following manner: "I look like a big goggly <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/11/funny-you-should-mention-it.html">owl</a>." I respect you enough not to belabor the reasons why this is important to the "blog." Furthermore, the character once again confirms <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/09/sexy-woman-who-can-lift-car.html">Ace's observation that Travis McGee's author especially likes women who are also powerful storybook giants.</a> The description of her devouring an enormous <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2020/11/chicken-in-air.html">picnic lunch</a> lies somewhere between <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2014/05/rabelaisian.html">Rabelais</a> and <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2016/06/catfish-of-ancient-egypt.html">Lovecraft.</a> As we have seen in the past, <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2018/11/regrets.html">Travis McGee fears being eaten by women,</a> though I have never thought to reconcile it with his <a href="https://jackpendarvis.blogspot.com/2023/10/mcneil-month-by-month.html">sexual</a> appreciation of hungry giants.Jack Pendarvishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16806664772804193571noreply@blogger.com