Mark Twain Yeti Time

I am always astonished when someone mentions Professor Irwin Corey, as is well established here. But somehow I was not astonished when Mark Twain was compared to Professor Irwin Corey in Michael Kupperman's new book, which has everything a boy could want, including Mark Twain on the track of the elusive yeti! "Fifteen days out into the mountains we struck gold - or rather scat, Yeti scat (poos)... I fortified myself with brandy and continued bellowing. 'I can stay here all day, stupid cold weather monkey!'... 'I've got your favorite candy here,' I continued, switching tactics." Albert Einstein is a major supporting player in the book (he and Twain open a detective agency, natch) and somehow it behooves me to remind everyone that in real life for really real, Einstein's granddaughter married a renowned bigfoot hunter. That is a fact you can look up on your computer! (Pictured, Mr. Kupperman in character with Chewbacca, which seems close enough.) PS (of interest only to Laura Lippman): Mark Twain goes to a disco with Shields and Yarnell.

Elke Sommer Speaks Five Languages

Remember our "post" the other day about Shields and Yarnell? What? You don't? What's wrong with you? I was going to tell you what Shields has been up to lately. This comes to me courtesy of Phil Oppenheim: it's a "link" to Shields's online shop where he sells his artwork, for example, a sculpture of a couple of raccoons on a motorcycle (pictured). Phil is also kind enough to say that I "made [his] day" with my recent Elke Sommer ruminations. He volunteers to "do the same" for me with a clip of Ms. Sommer bantering with Jack Benny (below). I know! You have no idea who Jack Benny is, unless you are friend of the "blog" "D." from Atlanta, who is the world's last known seriously hardcore Jack Benny fan. But chances are you are not him! Chances are you are a youthful "on the go" type person who can't be bothered to look up Jack Benny on wikipedia. In that case, I will describe the clip for you so you don't have to watch it. We find out that Elke Sommer speaks five languages (which is true) and then Jack Benny makes a joke about how nobody cares because she's so pretty. Then Elke Sommer sings a song from her hot new record album on the MGM label. I think it's called "He's a Clown." There's a sort of production number in a Spanish setting, maybe a nightclub. The background dancers are dressed as waiters and at one point they surprise everyone by whipping the tablecloths off all the little tables but leaving the dinnerware on top undisturbed, as in the classic magician stunt. Then they put the tablecloths over their faces Dracula style. They also end up twirling and whirling the tablecloths a lot. At the end they surround Ms. Sommer and everyone shouts "Olé!" There, now you don't have to watch this:

Shields

Remember the mime team Shields and Yarnell? Of course you don't! But I am kind of sad that Yarnell has passed away. Even though Shields and Yarnell divorced in the mid-80s, according to the obituary in the New York Times, I hate to think about Shields walking around right now with no Yarnell. Sorry to be a downer!

LiterJerry Matters

Everyone who has read our regular feature on the subject knows how horrible "Literary Matters" are, and how I occasionally attempt to soften and disguise their horrible nature by calling them "LiterJerry Matters" and making sure that most of them in a particular "post" are about the more palatable subject of Jerry Lewis and his relationship to literature. Today's "LiterJerry Matters" are even more palatable than usual, and there are just three of them, so relax. 1) First, I was wrong the other day when I stated flat out that Leslie Caron's autobiography contains no references to Jerry Lewis! I went back to Square Books and checked, just as I promised, and there are a couple in Chapter 20. Ms. Caron testifies that Jerry "had the whole town laughing" for the five days that FUNNY BONES shot in Blackpool, England. She also refers to the "teddy bear ingenuity" (whatever that is!) of Oliver Platt. 2) I thoroughly enjoyed Chris Fujiwara's new book JERRY LEWIS, which is from the University of Illinois Press "Contemporary Film Directors" series. I have been afraid to tell you how much I enjoyed it because I received a free advance copy from the publisher, and now the government demands to be informed of such things! I am scared of the government! But I understand their point. I never receive free copies of books from publishers. This was a real novelty to me. Well, I take that back. For some reason (maybe just because I live in Oxford, MS) I recently received, out of nowhere, a free copy of a book called WILLIAM FAULKNER AND THE SOUTHERN LANDSCAPE. I never cracked it open, so I can't tell you if it's any good. But it's a hardcover, so I put it on the shelf to make visitors think I'm smart. So those are the two free books I have ever received from publishers. Okay, government? Back to Fujiwara: the second part of the book is comprised of a masterful interview with Jerry Lewis, the best I have ever read, in that Fujiwara gets him to open up on the subject of technique, something he often seems unwilling to discuss in depth. In the first part of the book, Fujiwara brilliantly analyzes (among other subjects) the way Lewis plays with concepts of space and time in the cinematic frame. (He even uses a term - "Lewisian space" - we have used on the "blog," though to very different ends; all I'm really talking about is colorful couch pillows, while Fujiwara writes incisively about the way "Lewis's compartmentalized sets facilitate the discovery of inner narratives and secret worlds.") And here is one of my favorite parts: "Fairly long stretches of THE FAMILY JEWELS and HARDLY WORKING and, perhaps, nearly all of ONE MORE TIME are also lacking in humor. One of my premises is that Lewis's work creates an impure, shifting context within which such a lack need not be accounted a flaw." Somehow I find it touching! He is saving Jerry from people who don't find Jerry funny! "So what?" Fujiwara seems to say. I am simplifying. 3) Ace Atkins! I just read WICKED CITY by Ace Atkins. It is set in Alabama! And it is one of those books you can't stop reading at night even when you should be sleeping. It is one of those books that make you feel sad when you notice that the pages are running out, though at the same time you are racing through them like a fiend, desperate (and terrified) to discover what happens next! I see Ace around town all the time, and we often chat about our favorite subjects, which include FANTASY ISLAND, Shields and Yarnell, MAD MEN, Claudia Cardinale (pictured), and Megan Abbott. But why haven't I read his books before? Well, I have read one now and I am very glad. I don't have to tell the government about this, because I paid for Ace's book with my own money, and so what if he and I are friends? If I didn't love the book, I just wouldn't mention it. Okay, goodbye! These were possibly the least painful literary matters ever. But don't get your hopes up! Literary matters will probably remain on the whole just as unbearable as ever.

Shields and Yarnell and Laura and Jack

Laura Lippman and I were talking about mimes and robots and such through the powers of the "internet" and that made me think of Shields and Yarnell, and I said so. And Laura knew what I was talking about! And that made us both sad. For you see, Shields and Yarnell were mimes who pretended to be robots and THEY HAD THEIR OWN PRIME TIME NETWORK TV SHOW! (And suddenly I also remembered Mummenschanz, an experimental mime troupe who used to come on the Johnny Carson show in black tights and wiggle around on the floor. That's how TV used to be! We thought it was normal!)