Flickering Existence

Not by any plan, I have been watching and enjoying a number of John Huston movies lately: UNDER THE VOLCANO, MOBY-DICK and the one he made about Toulouse-Lautrec. So last night I watched THE DEAD. I didn't even consider that today would be St. Patrick's day! No, I just live by the seat of my pants, free and easy. I liked THE DEAD much better than the first time I saw it, back when it came out. Then I was a young punk who was very offended about the way they chopped up the last paragraph of James Joyce's short story, which I probably called "my favorite paragraph" at the time. This time I knew it was coming, so I was all right. Here's a funny fact. I don't think it's a spoiler or will get me in any kind of trouble because it was nipped in the bud. But not long ago I got the urgent idea to end an ADVENTURE TIME outline with Princess Bubblegum reading the last paragraph of "The Dead" to Finn and Jake. Ha ha! I knew it would never get into the show. It didn't make much sense, even. But I convinced myself that it flowed naturally from what had come before. Not the whole last paragraph! I'm not totally crazy! I had Princess Bubblegum starting with "Yes, the newspapers were right: snow was general all over Ireland." I probably used to call that "one of my favorite sentences in literature" when I was a young smarty, and I probably still feel that way. Adam was very nice about it. He made the note "I'm not deleting this" on the document. Ha ha! But he did go on to provide some reasonable notes about why this particular episode we were working on should possibly not end with Princess Bubblegum reciting the conclusion of "The Dead." Dr. Theresa didn't watch THE DEAD with me last night, but she told me a funny story about going to see it when it came out. She was just a teenager at the time and saw the title THE DEAD on a marquee and assumed it was a horror movie. You know how she likes horror movies! So she went in expecting a good scare. Ha ha! Well, the short story does have these lines in it, which sound fairly Lovecraftian out of context: "His soul had approached that region where dwell the vast hosts of the dead. He was conscious of, but could not apprehend, their wayward and flickering existence." Scary! So after I watched THE DEAD I wanted to read the short story again. So I got out my paperback of DUBLINERS. And I was like, this is a neat old paperback from the 1950s with a crease in the cover. I know I didn't have this paperback originally. I think I bought it to replace my first copy of DUBLINERS, which I gave away. And then I remembered the circumstances. I was in my 20s and a French girl came to visit Mobile, Alabama. I don't say "girl" condescendingly - I mean to express that we were naive boys and girls then. So three of us boys were keen to escort her around all the time. And we were so jealous of one another that all three of us took her everywhere. Like, if we went to a restaurant, it was a table for four: her and three guys, frantically jostling for position at the table. I recall the restaurant: The Ivory Chopstick. I remember that we all ordered two desserts. Two desserts apiece, I mean. We were so thin in those days. The Ivory Chopstick didn't have a liquor license and they got around it by offering strawberries floating in red wine and an obscenely soaked baba au rhum after dinner. I remember that we took her to a party on the water at Jimmy Buffett's mother's house (!?!). Long story. We all knew Jimmy Buffett's mother in those days. Tom Franklin was at that party and we delighted in strutting around the dock with our new French friend in front of him. I remember that we took her to somebody's house and showed her THE AFRICAN QUEEN on a tiny TV such as poor people like us had in those days. We thought she'd be impressed! (Strange coincidence! Another John Huston movie.) I remember that after the movie she said, "It was not so good." Ha ha! Thus we failed American culture. But I did get to drive her out to my hometown of Bayou La Batre without the other two guys coming along. And that's where I gave her my copy of DUBLINERS. And that's the exciting story of why I eventually purchased this strange but attractive 1950s edition of DUBLINERS instead of that one Penguin paperback everybody else has. So! After watching the movie last night, I wanted to read the story again. But I wanted a little noise on in the background. Don't you ever want just a little noise in the background while you're reading? So I turned on TCM, and because it was Jerry Lewis's birthday, they were showing CRACKING UP! And I thought: this is perfect. I just watched CRACKING UP the other night, so it won't be distracting. But I kept pausing in my reading of "The Dead" to laugh at CRACKING UP. For example, I'd happen to glance up and Jerry would be staring at me, straight into the camera. He does that a lot in CRACKING UP. Or he'd grunt or yelp or do what I can only call his "vocalise." And that was "cracking me up" especially last night. And then there was the scene when a server in a restaurant offers him a choice of many different kinds of salad dressing, including "bleu cheese" and "brown cheese." The phrase "brown cheese" really got me! Was it Joycean, "brown cheese," or that impossibly long and incantatory list of salad dressings, was THAT Joycean? Have I called Jerry "Joycean" before? I'll check. Yes, "click" here!

Graham Ogden

Last night I was watching the movie version of UNDER THE VOLCANO and Albert Finney had this awful neighbor who made me think of the character actor Grady Sutton. But he didn't really look like Grady Sutton, nor did he behave in the usual sweet and befuddled Grady Sutton manner. Something about him made me think of Grady Sutton, though. I knew he couldn't be Grady Sutton. I figured Grady Sutton was certainly dead by the time of UNDER THE VOLCANO. [Wrong! Grady Sutton died in 1995, if you can believe it. - ed.] But the point is, I couldn't think of Grady Sutton's name. It was driving me crazy. "Is this the beginning of the end?" I asked myself. I kept thinking, "What is that guy's name? Graham Ogden? Graham Ogden? It's something like Graham Ogden." It's all over for me. But I did get up this morning and check the "internet": a professor at a school of dentistry, a real estate agent, an Old Testament scholar... these are just a few of the many Graham Ogdens in the world, to my surprise.

I know I should have led off with a photograph of Grady Sutton but I was too mesmerized by the shot of Jacqueline Bisset in UNDER THE VOLCANO, standing between an orange (?) wall and an aquamarine (?) armoire (?), a color move which should have made me think of Jerry Lewis, but didn't.

Pythagoras Was Not a Vampire

I was reading LIVES OF THE NECROMANCERS... did I tell you about it? I found it because of a footnote by the 1927 editors of THE ANATOMY OF MELANCHOLY. Anyway, LIVES OF THE NECROMANCERS is by William Godwin, the father of Frankenstein creator Mary Shelley. In the section on Pythagoras, Godwin writes that he "hid himself during the day at least from the great body of his pupils, and was only seen by them at night." So then I thought, I bet there are lots of crackpot theories about Pythagoras being a vampire on the "internet"! But when I googled the phrase "was pythagoras a vampire" here's what I got:

Godwin says Pythagoras "taught temperance in all its branches." And didn't Dracula famously say, "I never drink... wine"? Pythagoras was a vegetarian, but ISN'T THAT JUST WHAT A VAMPIRE WOULD SAY to explain why you never saw him joining in at meals? "What, however, seems to be agreed by all his biographers" (writes Godwin) "is that he professed to have already in different ages appeared in the likeness of man." Aha! Pythagoras claimed to be talking about reincarnation, but I think we can all guess the truth. "He tamed a Daunian bear by whispering in its ear... By the same means he induced an ox not to eat beans, which was a diet specially prohibited by Pythagoras." OH YEAH? Well, I just happened to learn on the "internet" that beans can be used to trick vampires ("click" here for details - you might need them!).

Then I read about Epimenides and Empedocles, both supposedly students of Pythagoras, but Godwin says that's impossible because one was born too soon and one was born too late... but I think Godwin is forgetting the possibility that PYTHAGORAS WAS A VAMPIRE. When Epimenides was young "he was sent by his father in search of a stray sheep, when, being overcome by the heat of the weather, he retired into a cave, and slept fifty-seven years." Some nap! Empedocles said, "I well remember the time before I was Empedocles, that I once was a boy, then a girl, a plant, a glittering fish, a bird that cut the air." Has nothing to do with vampires, but sounds like something Finn has said on ADVENTURE TIME. One thing I like about old Empedocles is that he wanted to disappear dramatically from mankind without a trace, so he threw himself into an active volcano: "in the result of this perverse ambition he was baffled, the volcano having thrown up one of his brazen sandals." When you loosen up the search terms a little bit (removing the quotation marks, for example), you get this ("click" here) - not sure what it is, exactly... some notes for Pythagoras fan fiction in which he's a vampire? And check out footnote #13 to this scholarly article ("click" here) titled "Explaining Pythagorean Abstinence From Beans." Ha ha, like you are going to "click" on that. Or anything! To quote the footnote in part, "Lawson also reports that in Rhodes an ostrakon marked with a pentacle, sacred emblem of the Pythagoreans, is placed on the lips of a corpse to prevent its becoming a vrykolakas." That means vampire! Wait, maybe Pythagoras was a vampire hunter. Or maybe he was one of those vampire hunters who is also a vampire.

This Book Has It All

Not only does MARK TWAIN'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY 1910-2010 by Michael Kupperman have an owl in it, it has Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis in it - in the same chapter featuring a chimpanzee who conks Twain on the head with a mallet. Just ten chapters later: "I was 132 years old and my knee was hurting a bit... But I didn't realize what I was letting myself in for when I went to see Doctor Swami Volcano Rabbit. 'You should do acid, it's groovy,' he told me. I swallowed the pill he gave me without question; after all, he was a doctor, wasn't he? (It turned out he wasn't.)" Plus donuts!

Moth Story

I don't mean to brag, but I saved a moth from one of the cats today. And then I thought, "Hey, I could start a short story with an old man saving a moth from a cat." A few hours later I resumed my reading of UNDER THE VOLCANO and came IMMEDIATELY on a scene in which the main character is trying to save an unspecified flying insect from a cat ("In this preposterous fashion, the Consul stooping, the cat dancing just out of reach, the insect still flying furiously in the cat's mouth, he approached his porch"), but it ends up escaping on its own: "the insect, whose wings had never ceased to beat, suddenly and marvellously flew out, as might indeed the human soul from the jaws of death..." And my helpful inner voice said to me, "See? Somebody beat you to it, big shot. Give up already, you cheap punk." And I was like, "Thanks, inner voice! I will!" (Please note that the illustration does not match the text! I was looking for a picture of the old-time Batman villain "Killer Moth" when I came across this jaunty fellow instead. Via the Absorbascon, natch!)

"A Pathetically Erupting Volcano (Which Was Perfect)"

Director Sally Timms reports another rousing success with the third annual Hideout Christmas Panto. She cites "a pathetically erupting volcano (which was perfect)" and promises photographs to come, but she promised that last year as well. And now for your pleasure here's our Sally singing a lovely song:

Addendum

Hey, I just found out I've been assigned a second appearance in New York. I'll be reading at the Barnes & Noble in Greenwich Village on October 9th. I've heard of Greenwich Village! Here's a picture of a beatnik. I believe some of them live there. Hey, in the meantime, don't forget to visit your local independent bookstore! McNally-Robinson, for example. Tell them Jack Pendarvis sent you! If you buy some books there in the next few months I won't feel so guilty when you come to see me at the chain. Life is a series of sordid compromises! And I couldn't be more thrilled about it. Remember that episode of HAPPY DAYS when Richie Cunningham fell in love with a runaway beatnik who lived in a movie theater? But then she had to go away! It was sad. I recall that Richie wrote a beatnik poem in that episode - one in which he rhymed "purpose" with "usurp us." If you will excuse me, I'm going to go throw myself into the maw of a live volcano.

Another Earle

Kent Osborne has a good addition/correction to make to our recent "post" about LOST. He says that in the Tom Hanks movie JOE VERSUS THE VOLCANO, the Tom Hanks character stays in the Earle in NYC the night before HE TAKES A SHIP AND GETS LOST AT SEA!

"Blog"trospective 3: Movies

Here is a list of every movie that has ever been "blogged" about by name on the "blog." Though a promo for the movie SCAVENGER HUNT, for example, has been "linked" to, it has not been mentioned by name and will not be included in the "blog"trospective. Okay, now it will, because I just mentioned it. But you get the picture. Though some "fave" movies may have been mentioned on the "blog" many times, there will be just one "link" to each movie. If you're not too tired you may trace any movie back to its original source on the "blog," much like a modern day John Speke. 4 FOR TEXAS---5 DOLLS FOR AN AUGUST MOON---THE 7th VICTIM---THE 7th VOYAGE OF SINBAD---8 1/2---9---9 TO 5---42nd STREET---50 SHADES OF GREY---92 IN THE SHADE---101 DALMATIANS---2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY---ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KEYSTONE KOPS---THE ABSENT-MINDED PROFESSOR---ACE IN THE HOLE---ADA---ADDAMS FAMILY VALUES---ADVANCE TO THE REAR---THE ADVENTURES OF ICHABOD AND MR. TOAD---THE AFRICAN QUEEN---AFTER HOURS---AGORA---AGUIRRE, THE WRATH OF GOD---ALASKA---ALIAS JESSE JAMES---ALIENS---ALL FALL DOWN---ALL THAT HEAVEN ALLOWS---AMARCORD---THE AMBUSHERS---AMELIE---AMERICAN GRAFFITI---AMERICAN KICKBOXER 1---AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON---ANGEL FACE---ANGEL HEART---ANGELS OVER BROADWAY---ANGELS WITH DIRTY FACES---ANIMAL CRACKERS---ANIMAL HOUSE---ANNIE HALL---ANOTHER STAKEOUT---ANTICIPATION (sic)---THE APARTMENT---APOCALYPSE NOW---APOCALYPTO---APPOINTMENT WITH DEATH---APRIL FOOL'S DAY---ARIZONA DREAM---ARTISTS AND MODELS---ATM---THE ATOMIC SUBMARINE---ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS---ATTACK THE BLOCK---AUDREY ROSE---AUTHOR! AUTHOR!---AUTO FOCUS---AVANTI!---BABY DOLL---BABY MAMA---BACHELOR FLAT---BACHELOR IN PARADISE---THE BAD AND THE BEAUTIFUL---BAD BLONDE---BAD NEWS BEARS---BADLANDS---BALADA TRISTE DE TROMPETA---THE BALLAD OF CABLE HOGUE---BARRY LYNDON---BARTON FINK---BASIC INSTINCT---BATMAN RETURNS---BATMAN V SUPERMAN---BEACH BLANKET BINGO---BEACH PARTY---BEACHES---BEAT GIRL---BEDLAM---BEDTIME FOR BONZO---THE BELIEVERS---THE BELLBOY---BENJAMIN SMOKE---THE BERMUDA DEPTHS---BEST FRIENDS---BEST IN SHOW---THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES---BETWEEN TWO WORLDS---THE BIG BANG---THE BIG BUS---THE BIG COMBO------THE BIG CUBE---THE BIG LEBOWSKI---THE BIG MOUTH---BIG NIGHT---THE BIG SLEEP---THE BIGAMIST---BILL CUNNINGHAM NEW YORK---BILLY JACK---BILLY JACK GOES TO WASHINGTON---BILLY LIAR---BILLY MADISON---BILLY WHISKERS---BIRDMAN---THE BIRDS---BIRDS DO IT---THE BISCUIT EATER---BLACK ANGEL---BLACK CHRISTMAS---BLACK SABBATH---BLACKBOARD JUNGLE---BLAST OF SILENCE---BLAZING SADDLES---BLESSED EVENT---BLOCKHEADS---BLOOD AND ROSES---BLOOD SIMPLE---BLOW-OUT---BLUE COLLAR---BLUEBEARD (2009)---THE BLUES BROTHERS---BLUES BROTHERS 2000---THE BOATNIKS---BODY DOUBLE---BOEING, BOEING---BONJOUR TRISTESSE---BONNIE & CLYDE---BOTTLE ROCKET---BOY, DID I GET A WRONG NUMBER---BOYS' NIGHT OUT---BRANNIGAN---BRAZIL---BREATHLESS---BREEZY---BRICK---THE BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI---BRIDGE TO THE SUN---BRIGHT LEAF---BRING ME THE HEAD OF ALFREDO GARCIA---BROADCAST NEWS---BROADWAY DANNY ROSE---BROADWAY MELODY OF 1938---THE BROOD---BUENA SERA, MRS. CAMPBELL---BUFFALO '66---BUFFALO BILL & THE INDIANS---BUGSY MALONE---BUNDLE OF JOY---BURN, WITCH, BURN---BUTLEY---BYE BYE BIRDIE---THE CABIN IN THE WOODS---THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI---CACTUS FLOWER---CADDYSHACK---CAFE METROPOLE---CALIFORNIA SPLIT---CALIFORNIA SUITE---CALL ME BWANA---CANCEL MY RESERVATION---CANDYMAN: FAREWELL TO THE FLESH---CANNIBAL GIRLS---CANNONBALL RUN---CAPRICORN ONE---CAR WASH---CAREER---CARNIVAL OF SOULS---CARNY---CASABLANCA---CASANOVA---CASANOVA'S BIG NIGHT---CASINO---CASINO ROYALE (1967)---CASINO ROYALE (2006)---THE CAT AND THE CANARY---CAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF---CAT PEOPLE---CATCH-22---THE CHAMP---CHANGE OF HABIT---UN CHIEN ANDALOU---CHILDREN OF PARADISE---CHIMES AT MIDNIGHT (see FALSTAFF)---CHINESE OPIUM DEN---LA CHINOISE---CHRISTMAS IN JULY---A CHRISTMAS STORY---THE CINCINNATI KID---CINDERFELLA---THE CIRCUS---CITIZEN KANE---CITIZEN TANIA---CITY FOR CONQUEST---CITY STREETS (1931)---CLAIRE'S KNEE---CLIFFHANGER---THE CLOCK---A CLOCKWORK ORANGE---CLOSE ENOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND---THE CLOWN---CLUNY BROWN---COCAINE: ONE MAN'S SEDUCTION---THE COCK FIGHT---COCK FIGHT, NO. 2---COCKTAIL HOUR---COLD TURKEY---COLLISION COURSE---COME EARLY MORNING---THE COMIC---COMPANY MAN (2000)---THE COMPANY OF WOLVES---CONDORMAN---CONEHEADS---CONFIDENTIAL AGENT---CONGO---THE CONJURING---CONTAGION---CONTEMPT---CONTINENTAL DIVIDE---THE CONVERSATION---COOKIE---THE COOL ONES---COP AND A HALF---COP LAND---CORIOLANUS---THE COTTON CLUB---THE COURTSHIP OF EDDIE'S FATHER---COWBOYS AND ALIENS---CRACKING UP---CRADLE WILL ROCK---CRANK---CRASH (1996)---CRASH (2004)---THE CRAWLING HAND---CRAZY LOVE---CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE.---CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON---CRIME WAVE---CRIMSON PEAK---CRITIC'S CHOICE---THE CROSS AND THE SWITCHBLADE---THE CRUCIBLE---THE CRY OF JAZZ---CRY OF THE WEREWOLF---CURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE---CURSE OF THE DEMON---CURSE OF THE WEREWOLF---CYMBELINE---DAISY KENYON---A DANDY IN ASPIC---DANGER: DIABOLIK---THE DANISH POET---DARBY'S RANGERS---DAREDEVIL---THE DARK KNIGHT---DARKER THAN AMBER---DAY FOR NIGHT---THE DAY OF THE DOLPHIN---THE DAY SANTA CLAUS CRIED---THE DEAD---DEAD END---DEAD MAN---DEAD RECKONING---DEAD RINGERS---DEEP COVER---THE DEER HUNTER---THE DELICATE DELINQUENT---DELIVERANCE---DEMENTIA 13---THE DEPARTED---DESIGN FOR LIVING---DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN---DETOUR---DEVIL DOLL---THE DEVIL-DOLL---THE DEVIL'S BRIDE---THE DEVIL'S CABARET---DIRTY DANCING---DIRTY GRANDPA---DIRTY HARRY---DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS---DISCLOSURE---THE DISORDERLY ORDERLY---DIVORCE AMERICAN STYLE---DIVORCE, ITALIAN STYLE---DJANGO---DR. EHRLICH'S MAGIC BULLET---DOCTOR FAUSTUS---DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE GIRL BOMBS---DR. STRANGELOVE---DOCTOR, YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING---DR. ZHIVAGO---DOCUMENTEUR---DOGVILLE---LA DOLCE VITA---DONNIE BRASCO---DON'T LOOK NOW---DON'T MAKE WAVES---DON'T RAISE THE BRIDGE, LOWER THE RIVER---DON'T WORRY WE'LL THINK OF A TITLE---DOPPELGANGER---DOUBLE INDEMNITY---DOUBLE TROUBLE---DRACULA (1931)---DRACULA (1979)---DRACULA A.D. 1972---DRACULA (Spanish language version)---DRACULA'S DAUGHTER---DREAMS---DREAMS IN THE WITCH HOUSE---THE DRESSER (TV version)---DUEL IN THE SUN---DUMB & DUMBER---DUNE---E.T.---EAST OF EDEN---ED---ED WOOD---EDDIE MACON'S RUN---THE EGG AND I---EIGHT ON THE LAM---EL DORADO---ELECTRA GLIDE IN BLUE---THE ELECTRIC HORSEMAN---THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK---END OF THE CENTURY---THE ENEMY WITHIN (see THE STRANGER WITHIN)---THE ENGLISH PATIENT---THE ENTERTAINER---EQUINOX---ERASER---THE ERRAND BOY---ESCAPE FROM ALCATRAZ---ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK---ESCAPE PLAN---EUROPEAN VACATION---EVAN ALMIGHTY---EVERY WHICH WAY BUT LOOSE---EVIL DEAD II---EXECUTIVE SUITE---THE EXORCIST---THE EXTRAORDINARY SEAMAN---EXTREME LIMITS---THE FABULOUS BAKER BOYS---A FACE IN THE CROWD---FACE OF A FUGITIVE---THE FACTS OF LIFE---FAILURE TO LAUNCH---FALSTAFF---FALLEN ANGEL---THE FAMILY JEWELS---FAMILY PLOT---FANCY CLUB SWINGER---FANCY PANTS---FANNY AND ALEXANDER---FAR FROM THE MADDING CROWD---FARM!---FAT CITY---FATA MORGANA---FATAL ATTRACTION---THE FATAL GLASS OF BEER---FEDS---FILM---FIREWORKS WEDNESDAY---A FISH CALLED WANDA---FITZWILLY---FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS---UN FLIC---THE FLINTSTONES---FLUFFY---FOOL FOR LOVE---FOOTLIGHT PARADE---FOR LOVE OR MONEY---FOR THE BOYS---FOR THOSE WHO THINK YOUNG---FORBIDDEN PLANET---THE FORBIDDEN ROOM---THE FORBIDDEN ZONE---FOUL PLAY---FOUR ROOMS---FRANKENSTEIN---FRANKENSTEIN (2025)---FRANKENSTEIN CREATED WOMAN---FRANKENSTEIN MEETS THE WOLFMAN---FRED OTT HOLDS A BIRD---THE FRENCH CONNECTION---FRENCH CONNECTION II---FRIGHT NIGHT (1985)---FRIGHT NIGHT PART 2---FROM BEYOND---FROM THE HIP---FROZEN (2010)---FULL METAL JACKET---FUN IN ACAPULCO---FUN WITH DICK AND JANE (1977)---THE FUNHOUSE---FUNNY BONES---FUNNY FARM---FUNNY PEOPLE---G.I. BLUES---GABLE AND LOMBARD---GANGS OF NEW YORK---GARGOYLES---THE GENERAL---GENTLEMAN JIM---THE GHOST AND MR. CHICKEN---GHOST RIDER---GHOST STORY---THE GHOST STORY OF YOTSUYA---GHOSTBUSTERS---GIANT---GIDGET---GIDGET GOES HAWAIIAN---GIGOT---THE GIRL CAN'T HELP IT---THE GIRL FROM TRIESTE---GIRL IN GOLD BOOTS---GIRLFRIENDS---A GLOBAL AFFAIR---THE GODFATHER---THE GODFATHER PART II---THE GODFATHER PART III---GOING HIGHBROW---GOLD DIGGERS OF 1933---GOLDFINGER---THE GOOD HUMOR MAN---GOOD OLD CORN---THE GOOD SHEPHERD---THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY---GOOD WILL HUNTING---GOODFELLAS---GORKY PARK---THE GRADUATE---THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL---THE GRAPES OF WRATH---THE GREAT GATSBY---THE GREAT TRAIN ROBBERY---GREED---GREMLINS 2---GRIZZLY---GROUNDHOG DAY---A GUIDE FOR THE MARRIED MAN---GUMBY DHARMA---THE GUNFIGHTER---HAIL, CAESAR!---HAIRSPRAY---HAMLET (1969)---HAMLET (2009)---THE HANGOVER---HANNAH TAKES THE STAIRS---HAPPY-GO-LUCKY---HARD-BOILED---A HARD DAY'S NIGHT---HARDCORE---HARDLY WORKING---HARPER VALLEY PTA---HARRY AND WALTER GO TO NEW YORK---HARRY RESER AND HIS ESKIMOS---HARVEY---THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF HORROR---THE HAUNTED STRANGLER---THE HAUNTING---HE WHO GETS SLAPPED---HEAD---HEARTBURN---HEATHERS---HEAVEN'S GATE---HELLO DOWN THERE---HELLZAPOPPIN'---HERCULES IN NEW YORK---HERCULES IN THE HAUNTED WORLD----HERE COMES THE BOOM---THE HIDEOUS SUN DEMON---THE HIGH AND THE MIGHTY---HIGH SCHOOL CONFIDENTIAL---HIGH SOCIETY---HIGHBALL---HIS GIRL FRIDAY---HIS KIND OF WOMAN---THE HOBBIT---A HOLE IN THE HEAD---HOLLYWOOD OR BUST---HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS---HOME FROM THE HILL---THE HONEYMOON MACHINE---HOOK, LINE & SINKER (1969)---HOOK, LINE AND SINKER (1930)---HOOPER---HOPE AND GLORY---THE HORIZONTAL LIEUTENANT---HORROR OF DRACULA---HORRORWEEN---HORSE EATING HAY---HOSTEL PART II---HOT FUZZ---THE HOT ROCK---THE HOUND OF THE BASKERVILLES---HOUSE (1977)---HOUSE OF THE SEVEN CORPSES---HOUSE OF USHER---HOW SWEET IT IS!---HOW TO COMMIT MARRIAGE---HOW TO SAVE A MARRIAGE AND RUIN YOUR LIFE---HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING---HUD---THE HUDSUCKER PROXY---HUMPDAY---HUSTLE---THE HUSTLER---I AM CUBA---I AM THE PRETTY THING THAT LIVES IN THE HOUSE---I COME IN PEACE---I COULD GO ON SINGING---I, FRANKENSTEIN---I LOVE YOU, ALICE B. TOKLAS!---I.Q.---I SAW WHAT YOU DID---I SHOT JESSE JAMES---I WAKE UP SCREAMING---I WOULDN'T WANT TO BE A MAN---THE ICE HARVEST---THE ICE STORM---ICEMAN---THE ICEMAN COMETH---IF A MAN ANSWERS---I'LL TAKE SWEDEN---THE ILLUSIONIST---INCIDENT AT LOCH NESS---THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING MAN---INCUBUS---INGLUOURIOUS BASTERDS---INHERIT THE WIND---INLAND EMPIRE---INSIDIOUS: CHAPTER 3---INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS (1978)---INVASION USA---THE IRON PETTICOAT---ISLAND IN THE SKY---THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU (1977)---THE ISLAND OF DR. MOREAU (1996)---ISLAND OF LOST SOULS---IT STARTED IN NAPLES---IT'S A GIFT---IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD---IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE---JACK THE GIANT KILLER---JACKNIFE---JANE EYRE---JANE EYRE (later version)---THE JAZZ SINGER---JEFFERSON IN PARIS---JEREMIAH JOHNSON---THE JERK---JOE VERSUS THE VOLCANO---JOHNNY COOL---JOHNNY EAGER---THE JOKER IS WILD---JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS---JULES ET JIM---JULIEN DONKEY-BOY---JULIUS CAESAR---JUMPING JACKS---JUNEBUG---JUNGLE JIM IN THE FORBIDDEN LAND---JURASSIC PARK---JUROR #2---JURY DUTY---JUST LIKE HEAVEN---KALIDOR (see RED SONJA)---KARATE KID---KARATE KID PART III---KEEPING THE FAITH---KEYSTONE HOTEL---THE KID---KILL, BABY... KILL!---KILLDOZER---THE KILLERS---THE KING OF COMEDY---KING RALPH---THE KING'S SPEECH---KINGDOM OF THE SPIDERS---THE KISS---KISS ME DEADLY---KISS ME, STUPID---KISSIN' COUSINS---KITTEN WITH A WHIP---KUNG FU PANDA---THE LADIES MAN---LADY FROM SHANGHAI---THE LADY FROM SOCKHOLM---LADY IN THE LAKE---LADYHAWKE---LAIR OF THE WHITE WORM---LAND OF THE LOST---THE LANGOLIERS---LARRY CROWNE---THE LAST DRAGON---THE LAST MARRIED COUPLE IN AMERICA---THE LAST SUNSET---THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST---LAURA---LEMORA: A CHILD'S TALE OF THE SUPERNATURAL---LENNY---THE LEOPARD---LEPRECHAUN---LET IT RIDE (1989)---THE LIFE AND TIMES OF JUDGE ROY BEAN---LIFE OF BRIAN---LIFE OF PI---LI'L ABNER (1959)---LIMELIGHT---THE LIMEY---A LION IS IN THE STREETS---LISZTOMANIA---THE LITTLE GIRL WHO LIVES DOWN THE LANE---THE LITTLE PRINCE---LITTLE WOMEN (1994)---LIVE A LITTLE, LOVE A LITTLE---LIVING IT UP---LOGAN'S RUN---LONE STAR---THE LONG GOODBYE---LONG WEEKEND (1978)---LOOK IN ANY WINDOW---LOOK WHO'S LAUGHING---LORD LOVE A DUCK---THE LORDS OF FLATBUSH---LOST IN AMERICA---LOVE & DEATH---LOVE AT FIRST BITE---THE LOVE-INS---LOVE LETTERS---LOVE ME OR LEAVE ME---THE LOVE PARADE---LOVER COME BACK---LOVIN' THE LADIES---M---MA AND PA KETTLE AT WAIKIKI---MA AND PA KETTLE GO TO TOWN---MACABRE---MACBETH---MADADAYO---MADE IN PARIS---MAIDSTONE---LA MAIN DU DIABLE---THE MAJOR AND THE MINOR---MALONE---THE MALTESE BIPPY---THE MALTESE FALCON---MAN BAIT---THE MAN IN THE GRAY FLANNEL SUIT---MAN IN THE MOON---THE MAN WHO LAUGHS---THE MAN WHO WASN'T THERE---THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN ARM---THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN---THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE---MANHANDLED---MANHUNTER---THE MANITOU---MARDI GRAS---MARRIAGE ON THE ROCKS---MARRIED TO IT---MARRY ME AT CHRISTMAS---MARTHA BEHIND BARS---MARY POPPINS---MARY SHELLEY'S FRANKENSTEIN---MASCULIN-FEMININ---THE MASK OF DIMITRIOS---THE MATRIX---MCCABE & MRS. MILLER---MCCLINTOCK!---MCQ---MEAN STREETS---MEATBALLS---MEATBALLS 4---MEET ME IN LAS VEGAS---MEGA PYTHON VS. GATOROID---THE MENU---MERRY CHRISTMAS, MR. LAWRENCE---THE MERRY WIDOW (1925)---THE MERRY WIDOW (1934)---MIDNIGHT COWBOY---A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM (1935)---A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM (1968)---MILDRED PIERCE---MILLER'S CROSSING---THE MILLION DOLLAR DUCK---MILLION DOLLAR LEGS---MIMIC---MIRACLE ON 34th STREET---MIRAGE---MISSION TO MARS---THE MISSOURI BREAKS---MR. JEALOUSY---MR. MAGOO---MR. MAGOO IN PARIS---MR. MOM---MR. RICCO---MR. SATURDAY NIGHT---MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON---MR. SUPERINVISIBLE---MRS. SOFFEL---MIXED NUTS---MOBY DICK---MON ONCLE---MONEY FROM HOME---THE MONEY JUNGLE---THE MONEY PIT---MONKEY SHINES---THE MONKEY'S UNCLE---MONSIEUR BEAUCAIRE---MOONRAKER---MOONRISE KINGDOM---THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME---MULHOLLAND DR.---THE MUMMY'S SHROUD---MUSCLE BEACH PARTY---MY BODYGUARD---MY DINNER WITH ANDRE---MY FAVORITE BRUNETTE---MY NAME IS IVAN---MY NEIGHBOR TOTORO---THE NAKED CITY---THE NAKED FACE---THE NAKED SPUR---NAPOLEON DYNAMITE---NASHVILLE---NATURAL BORN KILLERS---THE NET---NEVER A DULL MOMENT---THE NEW KIDS---NEW YORK, NEW YORK---NIGHT AND THE CITY---NIGHT MONSTER---NIGHT OF DARK SHADOWS---NIGHT OF THE HUNTER---NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD---NIGHT OF THE LOUP GAROU---THE NIGHT STALKER---THE NIGHT STRANGLER---THE NIGHT WE NEVER MET---NIGHTMARE ALLEY---NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET PART FIVE---NINOTCHKA---NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN---NOBODY LIVES FOREVER---NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART---NORTH BY NORTHWEST---NORTHANGER ABBEY---NOSFERATU---NOT OF THIS EARTH (1958)---NOT OF THIS EARTH (1988)---NOTHING SACRED---LA NOTTE---THE NUTTY PROFESSOR---O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU---OBSESSION---THE ODD COUPLE---OF MICE AND MEN---OFF LIMITS (1953)---OKLAHOMA---THE OMEGA MAN---ON DANGEROUS GROUND---ON THE ROAD---ON THE TOWN---ONCE BITTEN---ONCE MORE WITH FEELING---ONCE UPON A COFFEE HOUSE---ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST---ONE FROM THE HEART---ONE HOUR WITH YOU---ONE MORE TIME---ONLY ANGELS HAVE WINGS---THE OTHER---OUT OF THE PAST---THE OUTSIDERS---THE OWL AND THE PUSSYCAT---THE PALM BEACH STORY---PAPERMAN---THE PARALLAX VIEW---PARDNERS---THE PARENT TRAP---PARIS HOLIDAY---PARIS, TEXAS---PARTY GIRL (1958)---PARTY GIRL (1995)---THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST---PAT GARRETT AND BILLY THE KID---PATERNITY---THE PATSY---PEE WEE'S BIG ADVENTURE---PENELOPE---PERIOD OF ADJUSTMENT---PERSONA---PETULIA---PHANTASM---PHFFFT---PHYSICAL EVIDENCE---PICKUP ON SOUTH STREET---PICNIC AT HANGING ROCK---PIERROT LE FOU---PILLOW TALK---THE PILOT---PINATA: SURVIVAL ISLAND---PINK FLAMINGOS---THE PINK PANTHER---PINOCCHIO---THE PIPE---THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM---PITFALL---PLANET OF THE APES---PLANET OF THE VAMPIRES---PLAY IT AGAIN, SAM---THE PLAYER---LE PLUS VIEUX METIER DU MONDE---POINT BLANK---POINT BREAK---POLICE ACADEMY---POLYESTER---POP GEAR---POPEYE---POPI---PORTRAIT OF JENNIE---PRESCRIPTION: MURDER---PRETTY IN PINK---PRETTY WOMAN---THE PRINCESS AND THE PIRATE---THE PRODUCERS---THE PRINCESS BRIDE---PROFESSOR WELTON'S BOXING CATS---PROPHECY (1979)---PSYCHO---PSYCHO (remake)---THE PUFFY CHAIR---PULL MY DAISY---PULP FICTION---PUMP UP THE VOLUME---PUNCHLINE---QUEEN OF EARTH---THE QUILLER MEMORANDUM---QUINTET---RADICAL JACK---RAIN MAN---THE RAINMAKER---RAISING ARIZONA---RAISING CAIN---RAISING HELEN---RALLY 'ROUND THE FLAG, BOYS!---RANCHO DELUXE---RASHOMON---RAN---RARE EXPORTS: A CHRISTMAS TALE---RAT KILLING---RAVAGERS---RAW DEAL---RE-ANIMATOR---REAR WINDOW---RED DAWN---RED DAWN (2012)---RED EYE---RED LIGHT---RED LIGHTS---RED PLANET---RED RIVER---RED SONJA---REGARDING HENRY---THE RELUCTANT ASTRONAUT---REMEMBER THE NIGHT---RESCUE DAWN---THE RETURN OF DRACULA---REVENGE OF THE CREATURE---RHINESTONE---RICHARD II (1997)---RICHARD III---RICHIE RICH---RICOCHET---RIDERS OF THE PURPLE SAGE---THE RIGHT STUFF---RING OF FEAR---RIO BRAVO---RIO GRANDE---RISKY BUSINESS---ROAD HOUSE---THE ROAD TO HONG KONG---THE ROAD TO SINGAPORE---THE ROAD TO UTOPIA---ROBIN HOOD (1973)---ROCK-A-BYE BABY---ROCKY II---ROGUE COP---ROLLERCOASTER---ROMEO AND JULIET---THE ROOKIE---THE ROOM---ROUNDERS---RUMOR HAS IT---RUNAWAY BRIDE---THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING! THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING!---SABOTEUR---SAILOR BEWARE---SALT AND PEPPER---SAMSON AND DELILAH---SANDY WEXLER---SANTA CLAUS (1959)---SANTA WITH MUSCLES---THE SATAN BUG---SATISFACTION---SATURDAY THE 14th---SATURN 3---SATYRICON---SAVING PRIVATE RYAN---SAWDUST AND TINSEL---SAY ANYTHING---SCARED STIFF---THE SCARLET LETTER---SCAVENGER HUNT---SCENES FROM A MARRIAGE---SCHOOL TIES---SCOOBY-DOO---SCREAM OF FEAR---SCREAMERS---THE SEA HAWK---THE SEARCHERS---SECOND FIDDLE TO A STEEL GUITAR---SECONDS---SEMI-TOUGH---SEND ME NO FLOWERS---SENIOR PROM---THE SENTINEL---SERENDIPITY---A SERIOUS MAN---THE SET-UP---THE SEVEN LITTLE FOYS---SEVEN SAMURAI---SEVEN SINNERS---SEX AND THE SINGLE GIRL---SHAKE HANDS WITH DANGER---SHAMUS---SHANE---THE SHANGHAI GESTURE---THE SHEPHERD OF THE HILLS---SHE'S ALL THAT---THE SHINING---THE SHINING HOUR---SHIP OF MONSTERS---SHORT CUTS---SICARIO---THE SILENCE---THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS---SILVER LODE---SIMON OF THE DESERT---SINGIN' IN THE RAIN---SISTER ACT---SISTERS---SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS 2---SKIDOO---SKYJACKED---SLAP SHOT---SLAPSTICK (OF ANOTHER KIND)---SLEEPING BEAUTY---SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY---SLIGHTLY SCARLET---THE SMALL MAGNETIC HAND---SMALL TOWN GIRL---SMOKES & EARS---SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT---SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT II---THE SNEEZE---SNOW WHITE AND THE THREE STOOGES---SNOWBOARD ACADEMY---SNOWPIERCER---SO LONG AT THE FAIR---THE SOCIAL NETWORK---SOIGNE TA DROITE---SOME KIND OF A NUT---SOMEONE I TOUCHED---SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES---SOMETHING WILD---SON OF DRACULA---THE SOUND AND THE FURY---THE SOUND OF MUSIC---SPELLBOUND---THE SPIDER---SPLENDOR IN THE GRASS---THE SPY WHO LOVED ME---STALAG 17---A STAR IS BORN (1937)---A STAR IS BORN (1954)---STAR TREK (2009)---STAR WARS---STARDUST MEMORIES---STARFLIGHT: THE PLANE THAT COULDN'T LAND---STARGATE---STEAMBOAT ROUND THE BEND---STEEL MAGNOLIAS---STEP BROTHERS---THE STEPFATHER---STEVEN UNIVERSE: THE MOVIE---STOLEN KISSES---STONER---THE STOOGE---THE STORY OF WILL ROGERS---LA STRADA---THE STRANGER---THE STRANGER WITHIN---THE STRANGER WORE A GUN---STRANGERS ON A TRAIN---STRIKING DISTANCE----THE STUFF---THE SUNDOWNERS---SUNSET BOULEVARD---THE SUNSHINE BOYS---SUPERDAD---SUPERMAN III---SUSAN SLADE---SUSAN SLEPT HERE---SUSPECT---SWAMP THING---SWEET BIRD OF YOUTH---THE SWEET RIDE---THE SWINGER---SWITCH---TAKE HER, SHE'S MINE---THE TAKING OF PELHAM ONE TWO THREE---TARAS BULBA---THE TARNISHED ANGELS---TAXI DRIVER---TEACHER'S PET---TEEN WITCH---TEEN WOLF---TEEN WOLF TOO---THE TEN COMMANDMENTS---TEN THOUSAND BEDROOMS---TEQUILA SUNRISE---THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE---TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE IV---THAT HAGEN GIRL---THAT THING YOU DO!---THAT'S MY BOY---THAT'S MY BOY (2012)---THEODORA: IMPERATRICE DE BYZANCE---THEREMIN: AN ELECTRONIC ODYSSEY---THERE'S A GIRL IN MY SOUP---THEY ALL LAUGHED---THEY CAME TO ROB LAS VEGAS---THEY GOT ME COVERED---THE THIEF OF BAGDAD---THIEVES' HIGHWAY---THE THIRD MAN---THIS IS MY LIFE---THIS IS SPINAL TAP---THIS IS THE END---THREE DAYS OF THE CONDOR---THREE FOR BEDROOM C---THREE FUGITIVES---THE THREE MUSKETEERS (1973)---THREE ON A COUCH---THREE RING CIRCUS---THREE VIOLENT PEOPLE---THE THRILL OF IT ALL---THRONE OF BLOOD---THUNDERBOLT AND LIGHTFOOT---THUNDERING HOOFS---TICKLE ME---TIME AFTER TIME---TIME BANDITS---A TIME TO KILL---THE TITANIC---TO CATCH A THIEF---TO HAVE AND HAVE NOT---TO SIR WITH LOVE---TO THE DEVIL A DAUGHTER---TOAST OF NEW ORLEANS---TOKYO DRIFTER---TOMMY---TONY ROME---TOO LATE BLUES---TOO LATE FOR TEARS---TOP BANANA---TOPSY-TURVY---TORMENTED---TORPEDO RUN---TORRID ZONE---TOUCH OF EVIL---TOUGHER THAN LEATHER---TOY STORY 4---">THE TRAGEDY OF MACBETH---TRAPEZE---TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE---TREES LOUNGE---TRESPASS----THE TRIAL---THE TRIAL OF BILLY JACK---TRILOGY OF TERROR---TRON---THE TROUBLE WITH ANGELS---THE TROUBLE WITH GIRLS---TRUE CONFESSION---TRUE CRIME---TRUE GRIT (1969)---TRUE GRIT (2010)---TRUE ROMANCE---TRUE STORIES---TURNER & HOOCH---TWILIGHT---TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE---TWISTER---TWISTER'S REVENGE---TWIXT---TWO-BITS & PEPPER---THE TWO FACES OF DR. JEKYLL---TWO-LANE BLACKTOP---U.F.O---UNCLE KENT---THE UNDEAD (1957)---UNDER THE VOLCANO---UNDER THE YUM YUM TREE---UNDERGROUND---UNION DEPOT---UNIVERSAL SOLDIER (1971)---UNSUCCESSFUL SOMERSAULT---UP IN THE AIR---UPPERSEVEN---THE VAMPIRE---THE VAMPIRE LOVERS---THE VERDICT---VERNON, FLORIDA---VERTIGO---A VERY SPECIAL FAVOR---THE VILLAIN---THE VIRGIN SPRING---VIRIDIANA---VISIT TO A SMALL PLANET---VIVA ZAPATA!---VOLVER---WAGNER---WAITING FOR GUFFMAN---WAKE ME WHEN IT'S OVER---WAKE OF THE RED WITCH---WALK, DON'T RUN---WALK HARD---WALL-E---WALL STREET---WAR AND PEACE---THE WASP WOMAN---THE WATCHER IN THE WOODS---WAY OUT WEST---WAY... WAY OUT---W.C. FIELDS AND ME---WE GO WAY BACK---A WEDDING---WEE WILLIE WINKIE---WEEKEND---WEIRD SCIENCE---WELCOME TO MOOSEPORT---WEST SIDE STORY---WHAT A WAY TO GO!---WHAT'S NEW, PUSSYCAT---WHAT'S UP DOC---THE WHEELER DEALERS---WHEN MICHAEL CALLS---WHERE THE SPIES ARE---WHERE THE TRUTH LIES---WHICH WAY TO THE FRONT?---WHIFFS---WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING---THE WHITE DIAMOND (2004)---WHITE DIAMOND (2007)---WHITE HEAT---WHO FEARS THE DEVIL?---WHO WAS THAT LADY?---WHO'S BEEN SLEEPING IN MY BED?---WHO'S GOT THE ACTION?---WHO'S MINDING THE MINT?---WHO'S MINDING THE STORE?---THE WICKER MAN---WIFE WANTED---THE WILD AFFAIR---THE WILD BUNCH---WILD IN THE COUNTRY---THE WILD, WILD PLANET---WILL PENNY---WILLIE AND PHIL---WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY---WIND ACROSS THE EVERGLADES---WINTER LIGHT---WINTER'S TALE---THE WITCHES OF EASTWICK---WITH SIX YOU GET EGGROLL---WITNESS---THE WIZARD OF OZ---WOLF---THE WOLF OF WALL STREET---WOLFEN---THE WOLFMAN---THE WOMAN IN RED---A WOMAN IS A WOMAN---A WOMAN OF PARIS---WOMAN ON THE RUN---WOMAN TIMES SEVEN---A WOMAN UNDER THE INFLUENCE---THE WORLD OF HENRY ORIENT---THE WRECKING CREW---WRITTEN ON THE WIND---WUTHERING HEIGHTS---X: THE MAN WITH THE X-RAY EYES---X, Y & ZEE---XANADU---X-MEN: FIRST CLASS---YOUNG BESS---YOUNG MR. LINCOLN---YOUR CHEATIN' HEART---YOU'VE GOT MAIL---ZARDOZ