Tuesday, April 21, 2015
Alone and Funky
Speaking of Funk! I was supposed to bring over some food to Lee Durkee's because we were gonna watch BARRY LYNDON. (Last time I watched BARRY LYNDON it was with Megan Abbott and Kent Osborne. What a combo!) Some place in town - which shall remain nameless - said, "We're not doing takeout right now." So I called Lee and told him so and he said, "Three people have told me that Funky's has the best pizza in town." Okay! FIRST! Understand that Oxford, Mississippi, is not the pizza capital of the world. The only person in town who makes good pizza is Bill Boyle. SECOND! "Funky's" is a "college bar." I've never been there before. I don't want to go to no "college bar." It's not where a self-respecting grown man such as myself would go! It's where Katy Perry went when she was in town. Look: So I was walking up the square to order some pizza from Funky's when I ran into Kaitlyn and her good friend the poet Caroline Randall Williams, and I said I was going to Funky's and Caroline Randall Williams said, "Order the Taylor Swift. While you're waiting!" And who am I to question the wisdom of youth? And so I did. I was the only customer. I guess it was early. I sat entirely alone at the long wooden bar. The "Taylor Swift" tasted like cotton candy and smelled like rubbing alcohol. Two boys in the kitchen were beating a big glob of dough into submission with their fists. Everybody was nice. Lee and I found the pizza acceptable, more than acceptable. Reader, we ate it.