Monday, October 21, 2013

Shut Up, Gandalf

There's a Laurie Anderson lyric that goes, "You know, I think we should put some mountains here. Otherwise, what are the characters going to fall off of?" I thought of that last night when I couldn't sleep and the newish HOBBIT movie was on and the characters were just constantly falling off of mountains, at least in the little bit of the movie I saw, they just kept going from mountain to mountain, falling and falling, falling off the edge, falling into crevasses and abysses and whatnot, sometimes just tumbling all the way down the mountain, and I learned an important lesson: you will never, ever get even the tiniest injury from falling off a mountain. When they tumbled to the bottom of one particular mountain a bunch of giant wolves started chasing them and this one dude was like, "Out of the frying pan..." and Gandalf bellowed theatrically in response, "And into the fire!" Ha ha! That was pretty unnecessary, Gandalf.