Extreme Remedies

Don't you want to hear about my hiccups? Sure, why wouldn't you? I had them early in the morning, but then I read about a man who hiccuped from 1922-1990 and it seemed for a short spell that the story had literally scared me out of hiccuping. So I went out and met Tom Franklin and hiccuped all the way through lunch with him. My hiccups were gone for my ADVENTURE TIME meeting late in the afternoon, but they came back this evening, shortly after the meeting had concluded. And reader, I am hiccuping as I type this. Hiccuping from morning until night! Mom warned me by phone not to try any "extreme remedies." I laughed and asked her what that meant. "Don't hold your breath until you pass out," she suggested. I promised I wouldn't.