McNeil's Li'l Bogie Bits: No. 8 in a Continuing Series

Welcome back to "McNeil's Li'l Bogie Bits," the only place on God's whole wide "internet" for all the latest, littlest bogie bits! McNeil recently read about Humphrey Bogart being stabbed in the back by his wife, which reminded him of the time - as reported by this very "blog"! - that John Wayne pulled an apple corer out of Bogart's - or "Bogie's" - back. Now, is the incident mentioned by McNeil the same one previously remarked upon? Well, there are similarities and discrepancies. The weapon in question, for example, is a knife in McNeil's telling, not the more anecdotally colorful apple corer put forth by Scott Eyman in his Wayne biography. Furthermore, to quote McNeil's paraphrase of the Bogie bio he is reading, the wound was "patched up by a doctor who would do such things on the QT for $500," not extracted by a movie cowboy in a bar! I got my John Wayne book off the shelf and cross-referenced a few things. First, yes, in "both" cases (or the single case, as it may be), it was Bogart's wife Mayo Methot who did the stabbin'. (This reminds me of the only good advice I ever gave a student, back when I was teaching. She announced that she was hitchhiking across the country with a kitchen knife for protection, and I said, "You need a stabbin' knife." Now you understand why I'm not teaching anymore. I suggested something with a serrated edge, as I recall. To be clear, if such a thing is possible now, this was after she had insisted that nothing I could say would dissuade her from her plan.) The Wayne bio contains compelling details, such as the name of the restaurant into which Bogart wandered with something sticking out of his back (Eugene's, which was on the Sunset Strip), and the name of the maitre d' (Al Murphy) who didn't want to let Bogart in because he owed the place $600. In perhaps the most telling detail of all, after Wayne removes the apple corer (putting "his foot on Bogart's back for leverage"), he takes Bogart "to the hospital to get stitched up." Now, this could be where the biographies converge. The book McNeil is reading even includes the name of the family friend (Mary Baker) who recommended the shady doctor. Both versions seem so plausible! I suppose we may conclude that they are describing the same event, unless Mayo Methot stabbed Humphrey Bogart on two separate occasions, once with an apple corer and once with a plain old knife. Now, is this unlikely? Or is it likely that if your beloved sweetheart stabs you in the back once with one thing, she might stab you on another occasion with some other kind of thing? I have no statistics on that. In the end, maybe if you choose to believe it was an apple corer or a knife tells a lot about what kind of person you are. Like one of those "personality quizzes"! One thing is for sure: there's always plenty to ponder when you get stabbed figuratively in the brain with another episode of "McNeil's Li'l Bogie Bits"!