The Strangest Surprises of All

Thanks to McNeil I am listening to these old tapes of this old conspiracy theorist on old youtube. You know, Dr. Peter Beter, who says that Jimmy Carter was replaced by a series of robots. "The strangest surprises of all have been caused by the Jimmy Carter robotoids," says Dr. Peter Beter. Oh, McNeil! What have you done to me? Dr. Peter Beter (ha ha ha!) explains that "the holographic computer brains in the robotoids include instabilities which were present in the real Carter brain." You know how that goes! So the Jimmy Carter robots are going rogue and screwing things up for their Russian masters. Dr. Peter Beter points to the time that Jimmy Carter told the press he was attacked by "a swamp rabbit" on a fishing trip. (That really happened, as I well remember.) So the Russians, according to Dr. Peter Beter, decided to kill the malfunctioning Jimmy Carter robotoid by entering him in a footrace! Ha ha ha! Oh, I shouldn't be laughing. The man obviously has problems. But that is a funny way to kill a robotoid. "Carter Robotoid #14 was programmed to run like the wind," says Dr. Peter Beter. Ha ha ha ha ha! Again, sorry. He also asks us to check SPORTS ILLUSTRATED for photos that will prove Jimmy Carter has been replaced by a robotoid. Oh, here's the "link" to Dr. Peter Beter, I guess it won't kill you.