The Sandwich Front

Much to report on the sandwich front: My sister claims that it is impossible to eat a sandwich while reading a newspaper. We brainstormed about tongs for awhile, but it came to naught. James "Jim Whorton" Whorton, Jr., on the other hand, says, and I quote, "It is OK to taste newsprint. When I was in fifth grade I knew a fellow who brought his lunch to school, a sandwich, wrapped, by his mother, in, newsprint. Every day!" While Caroline Young has this to offer: "I cannot help you on the newsprint conundrum. I don't eat sandwiches. But I do read all of my news on the spotless internet. Problem is, I am always enjoying a croissant while I do so. Question. If you think it is tough avoiding newsprint in your mouth, how do I retrieve croissant crumbs from my keyboard? Years of rejected breakfast lie between qwerty and and uiop." So, it seems that even with all our modern technology we have these days, the problems of the universe remain. Golly!