Saturday, February 06, 2010


Welcome once again to "C-Spandemonium!" Now you are going to think I am getting "political," but the "blog" doesn't really get "political." Still, I am going to mention Sarah Palin, whom I just saw on C-Span. On C-Span she said that her son had never "turned on C-Span in his young life." And the crowd, which was pro-Sarah Palin, and which knew themselves to be on C-Span, applauded and whooped in an ecstatic manner. Like, "Take that, C-Span!" Truthfully, it didn't even sound as if Sarah Palin meant much by it, but the crowd was eager to show its disdain for C-Span. Which is weird! I mean, C-Span is inert, you know what I mean? I mean, it is as if they whooped and hollered and carried on because she said her son never had a pet turtle or something. That's why our patented phrase "C-Spandemonium!" is humorous: because C-Span is the possibly dead pet turtle of networks. They just turn the camera on and go get coffee or something. They're not out to get you! Besides, they are doing you a kindness by turning on their camera at your event! You don't go rudely whooping and hollering and clapping about how superior and mean you feel toward C-Span! It's like spitting on a bewildered turtle! I don't mean "inert" or "dead pet turtle" in a bad way. I guess it is none of my business if people want to have bad thoughts about C-Span, but I can't understand it, I just can't, I want to cradle C-Span in my arms and tell it everything is okay.