Thursday, October 12, 2006

Clog 'n' Blog

Key members of the "blogging" team report taking a pleasant walk with Caroline Young (left) of Cabbagetown, GA, today. In her girlhood, Caroline was part of the Smoke Rise Cloggers, an unorthodox "clogging" team, the adventures of which came up during today's eventful walk. Caroline would "clog," she informs the "blog," with her partner "Pres" to the strains of Donna Summers' disco album LIVE AND MORE. "Clogging" came to Caroline's mind recently, when she ran into "Pres" at her high school reunion. A new neighbor of "Pres," a former "clogger" herself (we'll call her Betty), had sought to humiliate "Pres" not too long ago, by putting pictures of "Pres," as a boy dressed for "clogging," in all his other neighbors' mailboxes. Caroline was a bit bewildered that "Pres" and Betty apparently viewed their "clogging" days with shame. Caroline recalled "clogging" as "a healthy, non-drug-induced high." During the typical performance, Caroline would reportedly do a handstand, after which "Pres" would grab her by the feet and swing her over his shoulders. Mid-air splits were involved as well. The "clogging" coach, we'll call her Madame X, insisted that her "cloggers" be the absolute physical elite of the student body, and stressed the importance of the Presidential Fitness Test. Madame X, who, in Caroline's words, had a "severe Toni Tenille haircut and painted-on eyebrows" stood below and screamed epithets as Caroline clung to the bar, straining to keep her chin above it, thereby to meet the President's rigorous requirements. The Smoke Rise Cloggers caused trouble wherever they went through their heretical "clogging" techniques, such as lifting their legs too high in the air while "clogging." In traditional "clogging" circles, keeping one's "clogging" foot close to the ground is the mark of excellence and decorum in a "clogger." But the Smoke Rise Cloggers cared nothing for such niceties. They just "clogged" their behinds off, and the devil take the rest!