Here Comes the Kicker

Yesterday, while Dr. Theresa was out doing some errands, I watched MADADAYO, Kurosawa's final movie, a surprisingly (and gratifyingly) lengthy portion of which was taken up with the protagonist looking for his lost cat. During that section, the shamisen was mentioned a few times, as something - and I hate to say this - made partly from cats, and the man and his wife and all his friends were hoping that no one had made a shamisen out of his cat. I confess that in my ignorance, I did not know what a shamisen was, nor, in my obstinance, did I look it up. Okay! The next thing you need to know is that Dr. Theresa routinely dismissed the show GILMORE GIRLS when it was on the air. "Too girly," she said on more than one occasion as I sat there watching it. But somehow or another, she recently got the idea to give it another try. Maybe she's mellowing out! So, when she got home, we watched an episode in which a kitten appeared. "Is something going to happen to the kitten?" Dr. Theresa asked (something happened to a cat several episodes earlier). "I don't think so!" I said, reminding her, however, that it has been many years since I watched the series, and I did not remember every detail. Or any detail. Or anything. So check this out! The kitten got lost! Just like the cat in MADADAYO. Please do not concern youself: the matter was swiftly and successfully resolved by the eponymous Gilmore Girls. Later, of course, Dr. Theresa and I retired for the evening. As we often do, we set the bedroom TV to Frasier, whose soothing tones have lulled us into a peaceful slumber on many a winter's night. He's a human white-noise machine! We half-listened to two episodes. In the first, Frasier's radio listeners called in to describe their lost cats, much to Frasier's displeasure! Ha ha, that's not what Frasier's radio show is about, or so Frasier seemed to muse as he fumed. But he grudgingly let them describe their lost cats. This, you will note, was the third bit of entertainment I had consumed in one day concerning lost cats. Okay. Get ready. Here comes the kicker! Now, in the next, entirely different episode of Frasier, having nothing to do with cats, he mentions, of all things (are you sitting down?), the shamisen! His less educated friends, much like myself, don't know what a shamisen is, so Frasier somewhat smugly explains that it is "a kind of Japanese guitar." I did not have to look up the shamisen. It came to me. And with that, the circle of the day was complete. Well, I did have to look it up, because I didn't entirely trust Frasier, and you, by doing your own research, may judge in what ways the shamisen resembles a guitar, and in what ways it does not. The preceding has been adapted freely from an email I sent to McNeil.

10 Greatest

There is no doubt at all that the biggest news story of the year was my Spotify playlist "Hot Songs for Crybabies." Leaving that aside, it is time for us to consider the 10 greatest things that happened in 2022. I can tell nothing else great is going to happen before January. So let's go with the big countdown! 10. I looked out of a window with Sarah Lloyd and we saw a dog pooping. 9. Tom Franklin coughed up a live gnat. 8. Discovery of a half-smoked pack of cigarettes. 7. A brief interest in wombats. 6. I quit social media like some kind of fricking egghead who thinks he's a real big shot now and better than everybody else. 5. Announcement of an international consortium to figure out what kind of sandwiches the kids were eating in FANNY AND ALEXANDER. I guess that's six things. I guess only six great things happened in 2022, and despite the cagey phrasing, the sandwich talk most likely occurred in December, 2021. So maybe only five great things happened.

Hoot

As I am sure you think about all the time, my friend Megan and I have read 60 or 70 or 80 books about celebrities together and we show no signs of stopping until one of us (I) drops dead. Well, we ordered Brian Cox's diary (ha ha! I don't know why that's funny) from the time he played King Lear, and mine came, but Megan's still hasn't yet, are you taking notes? Because we each have a copy of the new oral history of Hollywood edited by Jeanine Basinger and some dude. So we decided to read that while Megan waits for Brian Cox's diary (ha ha!) to show up. Anyhow, and now we are getting to the really good stuff, we start in the silent era, of course, a section including reflections from Hoot Gibson (pictured, above), a very famous silent-era cowboy star as I am very sure you know. Before he was a cowboy star, Hoot worked as a delivery boy at the Owl Drug Company, which is how he got his nickname! People called him "Hoot Owl," which was shortened to "Hoot," because in those days, people were too tired to say the whole thing.

Three Owls

If you have been reading this "blog" for a long time, you will understand what I am about to tell you. If this is your first time reading the "blog," you are out of luck. Get out while you can. Where were you when I needed you? That's what I thought. Why are you still here? Go on, git! Anyway, in the Peter Straub novel GHOST STORY, one character tells some other characters, "You look like three owls." Five pages later, she is no longer satisfied with mere simile and calls them "You three owls." Let me stress, she is referring to three humans, not three owls. This should not be confused with the time I went to Los Angeles and encountered three books with owls in them. This is one book with three owl-like humans in it. (See also. And also.)

McNeilileaks

It looks like we're back to doing McNeilileaks again. That's when I leak the contents of my friend McNeil's emails. Recently McNeil presented some facts and posed an interesting question: "You know what I found out? Which maybe everyone realized but me? The universe existed for 10 billion years before our sun was born. 10 billion! Things were going on for 10 billion years before we showed up all fresh-faced with our gee-whiz attitude. What was going on all this time?"

Owl Time

Hello! As you know, I don't "blog" anymore. But I recently left social media, which has seemingly increased my temptation to "blog," which I don't do anymore. But! This is not one of those days. In an unfinished bit of old "blog" business, I am required by law to tell you every time I read a book with an owl in it. I am here to fulfill my impersonal obligation, which does not count as "blogging," by letting you know that the new (?) David Milch autobiography has an owl in it. Furthermore, in what I take to be a startling coincidence, the owl in Milch's book, which I read about today, appears to the author at 5:15 AM, while, likewise, in TODAY'S very installment of SOUR BLUEBERRIES - "click" here to read it, ha ha, you won't, and how I hate you for it - the sound of an owl (?) disturbs our protagonists' slumber at 5 AM. With that, I leave you to consider the workings of fate.

Cocktail Hour

As long as we're talking about things that should have gone into my cigarette lighter book, what about the movie COCKTAIL HOUR? I didn't finish watching it. But the heroine asks for a cigarette and a dozen men come springing from every direction to oblige her. It's a stampede! In the examples I used in my book (Anne Bancroft and Gillian Anderson, if I recall correctly), the cigarettes had already met the lips, and it was a light for which each heroine pined, resulting in a similar crush of attention. Still, it is part of the same mythological gesture. I wondered, as COCKTAIL HOUR came out in 1933, whether this was a particularly early example, but I doubt it. Some dramatic actions float beyond cliche, seemingly inevitable, without origin.

This Is My Life Now

Well, I have nothing else to do, so I thought I would inform you that Dr. Theresa and I watched the movie SUSPECT last night, in which Dennis Quaid holds a lighter up to a smoke detector in order to start the sprinklers going (or, in this case, a fire alarm; I did not see any water coming down). As you know, there is a whole section of my cigarette lighter book about whether or not that would work, and I can't remember which side I came down on in the end. Knowing me, I probably just equivocated like a low little skunk. Which reminds me (the lighter, not the skunk), the other night, Dr. Theresa and I watched PRESCRIPTION: MURDER, the TV movie that served as a pilot for COLUMBO. At one point, Columbo uses a lighter and a comically long flame shoots out, which is also covered in my book (the shockingly long flame, not Columbo), as code for a certain kind of bumbling. Columbo's antagonist was a pyschiatrist, and I wondered whether PRESCRIPTION: MURDER was the best title. I know a psychistriast can write prescriptions, but somehow the title brings forth images of a friendly family practiticioner with a deadly secret! Also, prescriptions really have nothing to do with the murder in the episode. I suppose you could say the evil psychiatrist wrote himself a prescription for a murder that he thought would solve all his problems. He didn't know about Columbo!

Every 12 or 14 Years

If you are a loyal "blog" reader, I am sure you will recall July of 2008, in which I picked up a book of symbols and found a mysterious card tucked inside. Well, yesterday, I picked up a DIFFERENT book of symbols and a DIFFERENT mysterious card fell out, right into my lap. Honestly, this second card wasn't entirely mysterious, though I had never noticed it before. It advertised the "web" site of the organization that had put the book together, a treasury of 18,000 intriguing images, which I combed through for hours. Eventually, I came upon a 14th-century illustration of a lion and a hare from a book called Kalīla wa-Dimna. Speaking of hares, I fell down a rabbit hole - ha ha! oh how I despise myself! - and read some more about Kalīla wa-Dimna, which is how I found out it contains a fable about owls and crows, the details of which I don't wish to trouble you with. Trust me, you don't want to know what happens to those owls! Loyal "blog" reader, are you still there? I am sure you will remember that in June 2010, a Square Books employee told me that crows hate owls and I meant to look up the facts of the matter, but never did. And I never will!

Not Publishing

You know how I am always being inspired by phrases. It is a real weakness! And I find most of them in the New York Times, which is just piling shame on top of weakness. But it is too late to change my life now. Anyway, I was reading about Emily Dickinson's house in today's New York Times, and came across a phrase to add to my collection: "Dickinson ‘had such freedom in not publishing,’ Cybulski said. ‘She could leave all those variants in.’” It reminded me of something notably eloquent that Sonny Rollins said about his grave distrust of recordings, I swear to God he really said it, but I have "clicked" on my Sonny Rollins "label" for this "blog" (visible on your laptop, but not your phone, I think; much like Cinemascope, the "blog" is not ideally suited to your phone) and I can't find that interview or quotation anywhere. I'd like to recall exactly what he said because I'll never say it right like Sonny Rollins. Something... about... how music is meant to exist temporally, fleetingly, and to capture it does it a disservice, because it falsely values that one captured moment over all the uncaptured moments that are at least equally important. That's not even close! But it does remind me of something I just read in the new Bob Dylan book. Old Bob maintains that a spectacular song and a spectacular record are not the same thing. "Some of our favorite records are mediocre songs at best, that somehow came alive when the tape was running." Well, I have "blogged" twice in two days, is this the beginning of a disturbing trend? After the TV blew up in 2016, we had a nice steep descent going, and 2019 proved to be a banner year for not "blogging." Then, the unpleasantness. Everything is still somewhat skewed. As of yesterday, we surpassed that nice low 2019 figure, meaning we'll just have to do better (less) in 2023.

Now I Have Nothing

You know I don't "blog" anymore, and now I have quit social media, so I have nothing. (You may "click" on this heart-tugging letter in the unlikely event you have questions or concerns. It won't help!) Still, once in a while you get something you have to put somewhere. McNeil writes: "You know how I said I was catching up on movies I missed from way back. Well one of them is the extremely mediocre THE WOMAN IN RED. So I caught this scene when Gene Wilder comes home with a load of 'work' his boss gives him. I think he is supposed to work at a PR agency and they are doing something with a trolley line." McNeil is incredulously delighted to recognize (see photo, above) the "Globe Illustrated Shakespeare" as part of the workload Gene Wilder's boss has sent home with him - in McNeil's description, "a giant red book that used to be on every bargain table in the 80s. An uncle gave it to me for xmas one year and I still have it." My grandmother gave me one as well, McNeil! It's around here somewhere. I will email you in a moment so we can discuss whether the scarlet volume, conspicuous in its rich burden, bears thematic relevance to the eponymous figure. [Editor's note: The predicted correspondence with McNeil indeed occurred. The author was given to understand that the load of "work" was in fact a ruse concocted by Wilder's character; therefore, the ludicrous use of Shakespeare was the character's, and not an error by the prop department or the director, who was Wilder himself. McNeil speculates that another item in the armful may be the script of the film itself, which, if it could be proven, would rocket the enterprise into unexpectedly mystical or existential territory.]

I Don't Want to Be Here

Let's get this over with. So, Dr. Theresa and I were watching the horror movie THE FUNHOUSE as part of our yearly Halloween thing we do. I noticed that a cigarette lighter was used as a clue in an interesting way, which really pissed me off. That's right, I use coarse language now, and I use it freely. I knew that the vital cigarette lighter clue meant that I would have to laboriously append a new entry to my index of things I (sort of) regret leaving out of my cigarette lighter book, which no one cares about, except maybe Ace Atkins, who texted yesterday to inquire whether he might borrow a gruesome detail from it in the service of his new work. But let us travel back in time, to our viewing of THE FUNHOUSE, and how my shriveled heart gave a hint of shuddering back to life as I thought about my entire section on matchbooks as clues. So interesting, I smugly mused, to see a cigarette lighter used in a matchbook way here in this film THE FUNHOUSE. I could tell everyone a thing or two about how unusual that is. Then I remembered, hey! The epigraph of the book is about a cigarette lighter as a clue, big deal, Godard even says (in the epigraph) how damn famous it is, that billions of people will remember it. (It's the cigarette lighter from STRANGERS ON A TRAIN... a false, planted clue, which would be an interesting distinction if I cared about anything anymore. You could say, for one thing, that in both cases [THE FUNHOUSE and STRANGERS ON A TRAIN], the lighter benefits the villain, whereas the matchbook is usually valuable to the detective or "good guy"... how I hate myself!) What's so special about this damn cigarette lighter from THE FUNHOUSE? Well, it appeared to be a white Bic, which, as Megan Abbott pointed out to me during the research phase of my book, is thought by some to be bad luck, which superstition ended up in the book, and I guess this lighter would have made a good addition to that section, as it (as hinted parenthetically above) alerts the murderous monster to the presence of the hapless teens, but then again, maybe the lighter was pale yellow. This was weeks ago. Days ago? It was the 19th. I'm so tired of looking things up.

This Other General

You will be happy to hear that Owl Creek has made an appearance in Grant's memoirs, yes, the very same Owl Creek that appears in that other notable set of memoirs, the dual one by Ron and Clint Howard. Here I paraphrase freely. This other general shows up late for a battle! A whole day late! He is like, "Well, I can't help it, Grant told me to go a weird way, by Owl Creek." And Grant is like, "I never said that! How funny that you think I said that!" sounding like the Martin Short character Nathan Thurm (pictured above), only I believe him (Grant, not Thurm), his persona in this book coming across (as I believe Megan Abbott put it to me the other day) "solid as an oak!" (Exclamation point hers, probably.) Grant says this other general probably went a sneaky way thinking it would enable him to do some heroics and be a big shot, but it didn't. Still paraphrasing, possibly incorrectly.

McNeil Month By Month

Everyone knows the story of how I got depressed the day our TV blew up and stopped "blogging" forever. I don't think I have made the connection quite so explicit before, but there was a definite cause-and-effect feeling in the air. Still, once a year, I climb out of my hole to pay birthday tribute to my friend McNeil, except for the one year I forgot. In the old days, this marvelous tribute consisted of remembrances of some of his "blog" highlights. For a long time, you see, McNeil was the primary source of my "blogging" material! As the years have passed, and the "blog" has dwindled, the material has continued to accumulate, I am heartened to report. The post-"blog" entries, for which the source documents are not available to the public through means of the "blog," are helpfully marked with asterisks for the scholars of the future who wish to comb through my humiliating private papers. But I'll be dead, so I won't care! Happy days, McNeil! And for your public, here is your life laid before them once more like a veritable banquet, which I trust it will continue to be for a good long time: September 2006: McNeil contends that he does not enjoy the "Little Dot" comic book. October 2006: McNeil furnishes a memorable quotation. November 2006: McNeil recalls playing Aerosmith on a jukebox. December 2006: First appearance of "McNeil's Movie Korner." January 2007: McNeil's system for winning at craps. February 2007: McNeil doesn't see what's so hard about reading a newspaper and eating a sandwich at the same time. March 2007: McNeil and I are talking about Bob Denver when HE SUDDENLY APPEARS ON TELEVISION! April 2007: Wild turkeys roam McNeil's neighborhood. May 2007: McNeil gets in touch with an Australian reporter regarding a historical chimp. June 2007: First McNeil's Movie Korner Film Festival announced. July 2007: Medicine changes McNeil's taste buds. August 2007: McNeil's trees not producing apples. September 2007: McNeil pinpoints a problem with the "blog." October 2007: McNeil presents a video entitled "Jerry's pre-defecation chills." November 2007: McNeil's Theory of Potential Energy. December 2007: What is McNeil's favorite movie? January 2008: McNeil explains why the wind blows. February 2008: McNeil admires the paintings of Gerhard Richter. March 2008: McNeil comes up with an idea for a Lifetime TV movie. April 2008: McNeil's shirt. May 2008: McNeil's apple tree doing better (see August 2007). June 2008: McNeil is troubled by a man who wants to make clouds in the shape of logos. July 2008: McNeil's apples are doing great. August 2008: McNeil refuses to acknowledge that Goofy wears a hat no matter what I say. September 2008: McNeil's grocery store is permanently out of his favorite margarine. October 2008: McNeil on the space elevator. November 2008: McNeil comes across an incomplete episode guide to HELLO, LARRY. December 2008: McNeil thinks the human hand should have more fingers. January 2009: McNeil discovers that gin and raisins cure arthritis. February 2009: McNeil gets a big bruise on his arm. March 2009: McNeil wants a job on a cruise ship. April 2009: McNeil attempts to rescue a wayward balloon. May 2009: McNeil visits the Frogtown Fair. June 2009: McNeil dreams he is watching an endless production number from LI'L ABNER. July 2009: McNeil sends text messages from his cell phone while watching a Frank Sinatra movie. August 2009: McNeil disagrees philosophically with a comic book cover that shows a mad scientist putting a gorilla's brain in a superhero's body. September 2009: McNeil resembles famed boxing trainer Freddie Roach. October 2009: McNeil wears a surgical mask. November 2009: McNeil reports that a bird broke the large hadron collider by dropping a bread crumb on it. December 2009: McNeil advises me to like the universe or lump it. January 2010: McNeil eats soup. February 2010: McNeil tells of the hidden civilizations living deep beneath the surface of the earth. March 2010: McNeil recalls a carpet of his youth. April 2010: McNeil starts wearing a necktie. May 2010: McNeil's DNA sample fails to yield results. June 2010: McNeil thinks up some improvements for the movie 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY. July 2010: McNeil reads to me from I, THE JURY. August 2010: McNeil finds a hair in his crab cake. September 2010: McNeil has a cold. October 2010: McNeil sends a nine-minute clip of a nice old man speaking at a UFO banquet. November 2010: McNeil sits in his car and looks at pictures of Jennifer Jones. December 2010: McNeil fears a ball of fire in the sky. January 2011: McNeil watches DYNASTY. February 2011: McNeil sees clouds that look like guys on horseback. March 2011: McNeil composes a "still life" photograph. April 2011: McNeil is upset when I interrupt his viewing of MATCH GAME. May 2011: McNeil pines for some old curtains. June 2011: McNeil eats Lucky Charms brand breakfast cereal. July 2011: McNeil investigates the history of the Phar-Mor drugstore chain. August 2011: McNeil compares Dean Moriarty to Dean Martin. September 2011: McNeil learns a lesson about pork and beans. October 2011: McNeil finds an article describing Robert Mitchum as "Bing Crosby supersaturated with barbiturates." November 2011: McNeil did nothing in November. December 2011: McNeil discovers scientists creating rainbows in a laboratory. January 2012: McNeil impersonates Paul Lynde. February 2012: McNeil dreams of matches. March 2012: McNeil's Theory of Potential Energy (see November 2007, above) used to chart the influence of Jerry Lewis on Carson McCullers. April 2012: McNeil disturbed by the art in his hotel room. May 2012: McNeil considers grave robbing. June 2012: McNeil's idea for "music television." July 2012: McNeil holds his negative feelings in check out of respect when the man who invented electric football dies. August 2012: McNeil reads me an old obituary of Charlie Callas over the phone. September 2012: McNeil concerned about T.J. Hooker's big meaty hands. October 2012: McNeil eats lunch at Target. November 2012: McNeil loves it when Bob Hope slips on a banana peel. December 2012: McNeil sees rocks that look like squirrels. January 2013: McNeil looks at an old, faded photo of a dog gazing into a Bath and Tile Emporium. February 2013: McNeil watches a video in which a hooded figure talks about "our criminal overlords." March 2013: McNeil wakes up at 6:40 in the evening, momentarily thinks it is 6:40 in the morning. April 2013: McNeil sees a singer who looks just like Bill Clinton. May 2013: McNeil is ashamed of himself for not realizing that Ida Lupino directed some episodes of GILLIGAN'S ISLAND. June 2013: McNeil mails a cashew tree. July 2013: McNeil watches GIDGET GOES HAWAIIAN. August 2013: McNeil recalls being rosy-cheeked. September 2013: A fairyland goes on in McNeil's head. October 2013: McNeil recalls tucking in his t-shirt. November 2013: The cover of a book McNeil buys says it is about Jerry Lewis, but on the inside the book is about Willie Stargell! December 2013: McNeil wants to visit an orgone box factory. January 2014: McNeil did nothing in January. February 2014: McNeil wonders whether Tom Franklin puts his hair in curlers. March 2014: McNeil takes a nap in the car. April 2014: The subject of McNeil pops up in an interview. May 2014: McNeil's emails on the "hollow earth" recalled (see February 2010, above). June 2014: McNeil looks forward to getting drunk and making insensitive remarks as I lie on my deathbed. July 2014: McNeil watches Jim and Henny Backus play themselves in DON'T MAKE WAVES. August 2014: McNeil tells about Robert Mitchum's hangover cure. September 2014: McNeil exaggerates the fate of some owls. October 2014: McNeil is incensed that a candy apple costs eight dollars at the airport. November 2014: McNeil's heart overflows with joy. December 2014: McNeil continues his 7-year chimp investigation (see May 2007, above). January 2015: McNeil listens to a conspiracy theorist who says Jimmy Carter was replaced by a series of robots. February 2015: McNeil recalls doing a report about matches in the eighth grade. March 2015: McNeil takes to bed with the flu! April 2015: McNeil and I establish an amazing psychic link. May 2015: McNeil bitterly recalls the time he brought a John Wayne movie to my apartment and we never watched it. June 2015: McNeil dreams about a bearded Dean Martin. July 2015: McNeil has a disappointing encounter with the Grand Canyon. August 2015: McNeil sees a squirrel holding a stick. September 2015: McNeil is saddened by the news of Dean Jones's death. October 2015: McNeil watches STARFLIGHT: THE PLANE THAT COULDN'T LAND. November 2015: McNeil sends video of Joe Namath making and eating a sandwich. December 2015: A coincidence of the type McNeil especially loves. January 2016: McNeil is in a grocery store and they start playing "I Don't Want to Go to Chelsea" over the speakers! February 2016: McNeil watches Don Rickles eat in a bathroom. March 2016: McNeil is duly thrilled when Megan Abbott goes to see CRACKING UP on the big screen. April 2016: McNeil swallows a gnat. May 2016: McNeil recalls the details of a screenplay we wrote in our twenties. June 2016: Destruction comes to McNeil's apple tree! July 2016: McNeil spots Dabney Coleman in an I DREAM OF JEANNIE rerun. August 2016: McNeil points out that Dean Martin had granddaughters named Pepper, Montana, and Rio. September 2016: McNeil is called a "filthy troglodyte." October 2016: McNeil advises me on what to do now that ADVENTURE TIME has been canceled. "I say take it easy for a while... just pretend to write when Theresa's around and then sleep or watch movies when she leaves. Oh hell, you know how to work it," writes McNeil.* November 2016: McNeil sees an owl while walking his dog at midnight. December 2016: McNeil finds an Airbnb listing by "eccentric millionaires" for a treehouse featuring "whimsical taxidermy."* January 2017: McNeil notices that there are lots of ants in his writing.* February 2017: McNeil roots for the guy who stole a bucket full of gold flakes.* March 2017: McNeil reads an article suggesting that all the gold on Earth came from the collision of dead stars and says, "Let's go get us some of this!" seemingly suggesting a trip to outer space.* April 2017: McNeil recalls that he was washing dishes in 2015 when the thought of Gene Gene the Dancing Machine came into his head. Then he discovered that Gene Gene the Dancing Machine had just died!* May 2017: McNeil watches ISLAND IN THE SKY with his dog.* June 2017: McNeil is happy to see a movie with rotary phones and "people looking up stuff in a filing cabinet for a change."* July 2017: McNeil begins alerting me to weather situations in my area like he's my mother.* August 2017: McNeil connects heavenly signs and portents with the death of Jerry Lewis. September 2017: A critique by McNeil inspires a choice of airplane reading material. October 2017: McNeil cruelly but fairly shuts down my scheme of crossbreeding an apple with a lemon. November 2017: "Death knows my weak spot!" McNeil exclaims.* December 2017: McNeil leafs through CARIBOU TRAVELER. January 2018: McNeil catches a cold and stays in bed watching old game shows, writing from his sickbed: "Bobby Van looks so healthy...but would be dead only 5 years later... GATHER YE ROSEBUDS!"* February 2018: McNeil gives me a good idea about how to win a coupla sawbucks from likely suckers. March 2018: McNeil's complaint about sleeping: "I dream way too much."* April 2018: McNeil watches a movie in which Dean Martin claims to "make a hell of an owl stew."* May 2018: I ask McNeil what lightning is for (see January 2008) and he explains it to me.* June 2018: McNeil's mom stumbles on an old book about the comical dog Marmaduke from McNeil's younger days and is excited to deliver it to him.* July 2018: While walking his dog, McNeil sees a bone fall out of the sky. August 2018: Having made it to season five, McNeil, though a stalwart fan, watches what he considers to be the worst episode of BEWITCHED so far.* September 2018: McNeil finds one page of a history skit we did in ninth grade. October 2018: McNeil emails a still from the silent movie BILLY WHISKERS, the subject of an innocuous, decades-long inside joke. Using me as an intermediary, he also consults Ace Atkins about the little-known film version of DARKER THAN AMBER... set in Florida but filmed, as Ace explains, mostly in Germany!* November 2018: McNeil asks me whether Jack Lemmon was left handed. I don't know.* December 2018: McNeil tells me about deluxe reissues of two Paul McCartney albums I've never heard of.* January 2019: McNeil says he only ever bought one cassette tape in his life. (It was Bruce Springsteen's "The River.")* February 2019: McNeil watches IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD and finds it difficult to believe a hardware store would close that long for lunch.* March 2019: McNeil tells me about a used car dealer in his town who secretly dealt drugs and would use his commercials to let people know a shipment had come in. If this guy's dog was on the hood of his car in the commercial, he was ready to deal some drugs!* April 2019: McNeil is thinking about the Bill James Historical Baseball Abstract.* May 2019: McNeil follows up on an email from 2015.* June 2019: Working on a secret project with McNeil. It never comes to fruition. July 2019: McNeil sees a guy in a parking lot trying unsuccessfully to fit a rolled-up rug in his car.* August 2019: McNeil cuts down his apple tree. September 2019: McNeil remarks that Brendan Gleeson should play Donald Trump... a prediction that recently came true!* October 2019: McNeil is at the dentist's office, where the muted cartoon on the television provides the caption "frightened quacking."* November 2019: McNeil is shirt shopping when he realizes that the age of some of his old shirts makes it likely that any new shirt he buys might be the last shirt he will ever need.* December 2019: McNeil watches the old Frosty the Snowman cartoon and is disappointed that Frosty lets himself get trapped in the hothouse again.* January 2020: There's a new vending machine at McNeil's workplace. It dispenses "gloves, knee pads, safety vests - even socks."* February 2020: A comic book cover McNeil likes. March 2020: McNeil ponders inventing "powdered meat." April 2020: McNeil misremembers an idea we discussed in 2005. May 2020: Something McNeil and I noticed in 2014 comes up. June 2020: McNeil gets seven shots of novacaine.* July 2020: McNeil begins noticing obelisks. August 2020: McNeil goes fishing with Dean Martin in the realm of dreams. September 2020: McNeil finds an article that his grandmother clipped from a newspaper... on the back is an intriguing but incomplete item about murder among circus performers.* October 2020: McNeil tells me about a fusion reactor in France.* November 2020: McNeil has a dream about "the best chocolate milkshakes in the world."* December 2020: McNeil reminisces about fence posts. January 2021: McNeil's fascination with obelisks continues to inspire. February 2021: McNeil's decade-old observation about gin and raisins confirmed by the New York Times. March 2021: McNeil has an idea for a toilet that plays commercials.* April 2021: There's a photo of Jerry Lewis hanging in the breakroom where McNeil works, and he had nothing to do with it!* May 2021: McNeil watches a live feed of a stork's nest. He's pretty sure they're storks.* June 2021: Ernest Borgnine's personality is assessed at "a million watts." McNeil rates him 11 watts at most. July 2021: McNeil watches half of CHANGE OF HABIT and it's not as bad as he remembered.* August 2021: McNeil is envious that the fictional character Travis McGee gets to live on a boat.* September 2021: A guy at work asks McNeil if he has change for a quarter, because he's going to "drop a dime" on McNeil.* October 2021: McNeil and I coincidentally have doctor's appointments ON THE SAME DAY!!!!!!* November 2021: McNeil asks if I remember a song our high school band played at pep ralleys. It goes like this, according to McNeil (direct quotation to follow): "bom, bom, bom, bom-bom....bom, bom, bom, bom-bom....bom, bom, bom, bom-bom.....bom-bom-bom."* December 2021: McNeil dreams about Carol Channing... and within the dream, CAROL CHANNING HERSELF HAS A DREAM!* January 2022: McNeil and I correspond about a place where Eleanor Roosevelt used to live. February 2022: McNeil and I discuss a possible plot for something in which some crooks ask for a $250,000 payoff in quarters.* March 2022: McNeil is concerned about the sexual activities of some birds.* April 2022: Someone in McNeil's breakroom at work is listening to a recording of Jerry Clower, which upsets McNeil.* May 2022: McNeil covets a glowing orb. June 2022: McNeil and I debate whether the Falcon or Thin Man movies qualify as "serials."* July 2022: McNeil visits Albany, NY!* August 2022: I am given reason to recall the time McNeil swallowed a gnat (see the entry for April 2016, above). September 2022: McNeil finds a half-smoked pack of cigarettes that belonged to his grandfather. October 2022: McNeil is thinking about Leo Gorcey (pictured above) and abandoned motels.*

Old "Blog" Business

Now it is time for the worst part of the "blog," which I enjoy even less than you do - the time when I babble about some fact I just discovered that should have gone into the cigarette lighter book I wrote, which was published in 2016, so it just doesn't matter, so why bring it up? Yes, though I don't "blog" anymore, there are certain pieces of "blog" business that return to haunt us. So, last night I happened to be finally reading the memoirs of President U. S. Grant, in a glossy, maniacally annotated hardcover, which I purchased at Square Books for a no-doubt princely sum long forgotten. In late 2017! So even then, nearly two years after the publication of my so-called cigarette lighter book, it all would have been for nothing. Like everything! So that's no surprise. Anyhow, Grant has some things to say about tobacco smuggling operations between Mexico and the USA in the late 1830s (maybe? The book is big and heavy and sitting in the other room and I'm tired), and about the popularity of cigarettes at that time in general, which (the latter) is a subject that vexed me during my research for the cigarette lighter book. I suddenly realized one day, whilst mooning away at my writing desk, that I needed to know about the history of cigarettes. Otherwise, I might accidentally describe a cigar lighter, wasting everyone's valuable time! I'd hate to tell you, even if I knew, how many hours I brooded about the differences between a cigar and a cigarette. What I liked about the cigarettes that Grant was going on and on about was the corn husks they were rolled in. That put me in mind of the first possible recorded cigarette, at least as far as I could tell on a quick deadline, which (the cigarette) had been coincidentally offered to a travler in Mexico... in 1518! Oh, how my little heart pitter-pattered as I ran to the shelf whereon sat the seldom-opened book I wrote about cigarette lighters. After some scuttling around, I found the passage, but a telltale ellipsis, the lazy typist's best friend, magaged to obliterate the part of the sentence that I vaguely recalled might have had corn husks in it. Oh, wouldn't that have been something, though? My corn husk research might have changed the world, if only I had tried harder.

A Man of Song

McNeil was telling me about a journal he has kept for decades and I begged to read it but he said no. Finally, he let me see a sliver from 2003, when I telephoned to inform him about a Bob Hope LP I had purchased. Even though Bob was wearing an ascot on the cover, according to McNeil's journal, I had absolutely no memory of the conversation or the recording. McNeil jostled my memory, and kept jostling it, until the record came dimly back into what I laughingly call my mind. I promised to look for it! For, you see, back in 2003, I had read McNeil the liner notes over the phone, and he wanted to hear them again, now, in our present day. Here's the problem! When we moved into this house, I just threw stuff all over the place. The records are not in any order. Anyway, I finally tracked it down, and I guess the portentousness had amused me, a lot of stuff like, "jokes and comedy are not the whole of Bob Hope. It must also be added that he is a man of song." But! That's not why I called you here today. While McNeil was going through an old box, he found a pack of his grandfather's cigarettes. "Half the smokes are still there!" McNeil boasted. I was most impressed by the brand name... Spud Imperial. I've never heard such a bewitching combination of words. I noticed the word "SAFETY" on the side of the pack (though I seem to have cut it off above), and a little rooting around on the "internet" led me to some magazine ads for Spud Imperial. "They're not a remedy," one warned, in case that was what you thought! I don't "blog" anymore, but when I saw the brand name Spud Imperial, I knew at once that an exception had to be made.

I Have a Simile to Report

There appears in the memoirs of Mary Rodgers an unconvincing similie claiming that something or other is "like getting a carved owl for your birthday."

Good Book

There's a point to this story, maybe, if it's a story. Chelsea Hogue interviewed me about my new poetry chapbook WEIRD SKY. She brought up owls, because, as it so happens, she was a student in the very undergraduate workshop in which I started forcing students to put owls in their work. In one of my answers to Chelsea's probing questions, I mentioned that owls are considered to be bad luck in some cultures, which I had been thinking about a lot lately, because (I didn't mention this in the interview) RESERVATION DOGS is my favorite TV show in a very long time, and I had noticed that the eyes of an owl figurine were blurred out in post-production, and that some of the young Indigenous characters were obviously freaked out by the owl. And it occurred to me that I had never really looked into any negative beliefs regarding owls. Sam Shepard mentions similar Tibetan associations with the owl on the very page where I keep my big long list of books with owls in them, but I hadn't thought about that until just now. I believe my first indication that owls could be considered bad luck, I guess you'd call it, was from my friend Sarah Marine, who informed me privately that some particular of her Indigenous friends would hate to know how many owls I had collected, and would be worried for me. Is there a story coming? I don't think so anymore, if I ever really did. But after mulling over the interview with Chelsea, I decided to finally do some internet research into the matter, which is how I came upon a website that looks as if it has not been updated since the mid-90s. There, a few various Indigenous beliefs and stories about owls were listed, along with some suggested resources, such as a book called OWLS IN FOLKLORE AND NATURAL HISTORY, which was referred to encouragingly if somewhat vaguely as a "good book." So I got hold of that book, to see if I could find out more... of the dark side of owls! I have to say, it's a pretty skinny book to be so damn supposedly good, but okay. I haven't really looked at it yet. I did open it at random, to a passage by Alexander Wilson, who, if you recall from "blog" history, shared my obsession with the mysterious circumstances of his friend Meriwether Lewis's death. Sadly, Wilson's passage was all about (I paraphrase) how nutty we all are to think that owls are some kind of magical death birds. They're just birds, people! Such are Alexander Wilson's conclusions on the matter. But the main thing I meant to say is that it is sort of cheating to buy a book called OWLS IN FOLKLORE AND NATURAL HISTORY and then put it on a list of books with owls in them. It's a fait accompli! Yet here we are.

I Knew It

I've been reading Andy Warhol's novel, the title of which is "a" - that's right, the lower-case letter a. So even before I cracked it open, I thought, oh, boy! If this novel has an owl in it, it will always be the first on my alphabetical list of books with owls in them, nothing will ever beat it! How strange to meet certainty in our troubled times. And, of course, Ondine (our protagonist) makes a joke about White Owl cigars. I almost didn't make it there. Early on, a sexual act was described - now, hold it right there! I am no prude. I say go for it! But baked beans were put to a use I don't wish to discuss. Is that where I draw the line? The jury is still out. Anyway, Megan and I had read Warhol's diaries together, and also a recent biography of Warhol (both of which had owls in them), so she threatened to read the novel as well, which I forbade. It was like when we went to the Yoko Ono exhibit and Megan kept running ahead of me and guiding me away from anything too bold and frank. Well! I don't "blog" anymore, but something has been on my mind, and it is sort of relevant to our current discussion. I had always thought of Serendipity 3 as a touristy dessert place that figured in a John Cusak movie. I didn't know it held such a special place in Warhol's life until I read the biography. So... having had a premonition of his death, Warhol goes there for what he figures will be his last treat, and right he is. But! The biographer, after describing the moment, feels it necessary to include a parenthetical screed about how Warhol's death premonition was irrational, even if it came true. Who is he trying to convince? Would he stand over a dead body and say, "Well, you saw this coming, but that was irrational"? The dead person doesn't care! That's all I want to say.

Sitting

I've been sitting on this for a while. Yes, yes, checking my records, I see that on August 2 of this year, I became fascinated by wombats for a couple of hours. As a result, I "tweeted" on the subject, to which someone responded with the fact that Dante Gabriel Rossetti (pictured) kept wombats as pets. Naturally, I scurried around the "internet," seeking corroboration, which I found immediately, via a scholarly article, which quoted a poem about wombats by Mr. Rossetti. In the poem, Mr. Rossetti compares wombats favorably with owls and bats (two creatures often linked in literature, as we have seen, though seldom in the company of wombats). As you well know, I no longer "blog," although I am required by state law to maintain my famous list of books with owls in them. However! The article had no footnotes, as I recall, and now I am much too tired to check. So I have no way of knowing if the wombat poem (which appeared in a letter) was ever published, either in a book of Rossetti's poetry or in a book of his correspondence, or whether the author of the article was just rummaging around in Dante Gabriel Rossetti's things, looking for wombat information, a quest to which his life is no doubt devoted.

It Is Happening Again

Tom Franklin coughed up a living gnat yesterday morning. I mention it only because McNeil swallowed a gnat on April 21, 2016.

All-Star Entertainment Wrap-Up

Hello! It has been seven years since our previous installment of All-Star Entertainment Wrap-Up, for the simple reason that nothing has happened in the world of sizzling all-star entertainment... until now! A dimly remembered figure from the "blog's" distant past has emerged. We can only be speaking of none other than PHIL OPPENHEIM, with a dazzling report from the land of the stars, Hollywood, USA! Phil saw AUSTIN PENDLETON in a parking lot! But the excitement doesn't stop there! He spied with his little eye famed robot BRENT SPINER in Nate 'n Al's, the same place where YOUR FAITHFUL CORRESPONDENT once enjoyed some CHOPPED LIVER while on a break from an auction of BOB HOPE'S personal effects. (Phil recommends the CHEF'S SALAD, the COBB SALAD, and the TUNA SALAD. Rumor on the hush-hush has it that Phil has turned into a real "salad man.") We're not done! Phil also saw ARSENIO HALL in a coffee shop! And thusly, seven years of entertainment drought, as foretold in the ancient prophecy, have come to a happy end. As long as we have you here, we should report that the recent ANDY WARHOL biography by BLAKE GOPNIK refers to Andy and his pals as "NIGHT OWLS" who eat breakfast at 6 PM. That's some late breakfast, celebrity entertainment style! And of course it makes the Andy Warhol biography a BOOK WITH AN OWL IN IT. That's it for now, from the land of sizzling celebrity stars. See you in 2029!

I Accidentally Saw an Obelisk

I don't "blog" anymore, but I accidentally saw an obelisk, which I am morally and contractually obliged to report. This came about as I dawdled around on youtube, traipsing hither and yon in a digital sense. Youtube itself boldly recommended a clip of CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM. I was like, "Okay, youtube, I'll bite!" A freewheeling scene between Larry and a divorce lawyer unspooled. To conclude, and I shall keep you in suspense no longer, the divorce lawyer had an obelisk.

Why, God? A Great Misfortune

A guy on twitter was rightly boasting, in a bittersweet way, that he had finished THE PICKWICK PAPERS, and as proof of a sort, he photographed the last page, and it was in this way that I learned, through no fault of my own, that the last paragraph of THE PICKWICK PAPERS has an owl in it. Now I have to put it on my list of books with owls in them, which I mysteriously maintain, and I didn't even have the pleasure of reading it, though I do have a copy of it around here somewhere.

His Friend

Reading the Andy Warhol diaries. One minute he's hanging out with Phyllis Diller at the office, then he's in London, where his friend invents chocolate soup. Next thing you know Andy goes to a benefit where someone's onstage singing "The Owl and the Pussycat," though whether it is a musical setting of Edward Lear's poem, or if someone decided to write an unrelated song with an identical title, I will never know, because I'm too tired. Nevertheless. The thing you will be most excited about is that I "blogged" at the time about Phyllis Diller's 2007 appearance on the Jay Leno program. But wait! The other guest that evening was there to plug a movie about the Andy Warhol gang! I wonder if Phyllis leaned over during the commercial break and said, "We used to hang out at the office!"

A Most Unpleasant Owl

As you know, I tell you every time I read a book with an owl in it. Why? I guess because I've been doing it for more than 10 years and there is no way to stop. Now, the moment I picked up a book by Salvador Dali, I felt a 98% certainty it would have an owl in it. But little could I have known it would be an owl of such a thoroughly unpleasant mien. This owl was a vision of Dali's, I guess we could say. It appeared on people's heads. It was, if I recall correctly, a kind of hallucinated figurine, and on the owl's own head was... how I can say this? Some poop. Poop adorned the head of the owl. Poop of a particular... no, I shan't continue. What am I, the author of Till Eulenspiegel? Ha ha, you guys know what I'm talking about.

Invisible Obelisk

I don't "blog" anymore, but by no means did I want you to think that McNeil has stopped looking for obelisks. He sent me the above photo (seemingly from a television show called UFO) and requested a glowing orb to put on his desk. He also told me to "note the obelisk." Friends, I looked all over and didn't see the obelisk! I communicated my alarm to McNeil! I concluded - too hastily - that the thing resembling a crystal ball was the "glowing orb," not the white circle, which, as I examined it, looked so flat and artificial that I decided McNeil has placed it there through computer wizardry, in order to mark the obelisk in question. I furthermore concluded, on the basis of zero evidence, that McNeil had meant to draw a red circle (or suchlike) around the obelisk but had, instead, made an opaque white circle by mistake. Confronted with my theory, McNeil was appalled. The flat white circle was indeed the object of McNeil's admiration, a supposed "glowing orb" original to the work as televised. The obelisk, he said, was on the left front corner of the desk (from the POV of someone sitting behind it). Then I saw it! And if you look, you can see it too. Maybe you have already seen it with your fresh young eyes that are not yet old and weak like mine. In conclusion, I mentioned to McNeil that the white dot looked like something that may have been placed there by censors to cover a large hole in the seat of the man's pants. Yes, McNeil replied facetiously, that would explain the slide whistle sound effect when the man turned around. And now you know why I don't "blog" anymore.

Corn Bath Danger

Megan and I are reading the autobiography of Salvador Dali, in which a young Dali decides to take a bath in a bushel of raw corn. We talked about that a lot, and I was put in mind of the film WITNESS, which features death by corn. I think it's corn. Anyway, someone is suffocated in a silo. Megan and I discussed the dangers of grain storage, which are serious and numerous. Megan dug around (as she does) and eventually sent me this article ("click" here), which I admired for the way it really gets across the temptation of a good corn bath before plunging into the terrifying downside, and also for the name of one of its interviewees, Bodie Blissett, who was buried up to his neck in corn.

Famously Complicated Feelings

From that Olga Tokarczuk book: "There are dogs on leads, monkeys in chains, much-loved parrots in silver-plated cages." Now, when you have that many monkeys and that many dogs, it seems inevitable that one of the monkeys will ride one of the dogs. Does Tokarczuk make such an interaction explicit? I regret to say she does not. Or perhaps "regret" is the wrong word, given the "blog's" famously complicated feelings about monkeys riding dogs.

Today Is Easter

You know very well I don't "blog" anymore, but today is Easter. That's not why I'm "blogging." But something happened that is a little too long to explain in a tweet. God knows I tried. Anyway, I started self-publishing a novel called SOUR BLUEBERRIES on the "internet." The events of SOUR BLUEBERRIES take place between December 20, 2019 and November 3, 2020. We all know what happened around that time in real life. Now, I didn't know what all was going to happen when I first started writing the novel! So, as I had given titles to every chapter, I decided to arrange the novel alphabetically according to title, rather than chronologically, to... to make a point about... to... I can't remember. So! I started publishing on February 14, 2022, not because it was Valentine's Day, but because I had recently become unemployed, and I thought asking people to pay for my new serialized alphabetical novel would be a good way to make some extra money (I was wrong). So! Are you still with me? By sheer coincidence (or was it predestination?), having arranged my chapters from Aaron Neville to Zyrtec, and having been, furthermore, in the habit of publishing one or two a day, it so happened that today, on the very holiday of Easter itself, we came to a chapter entitled "Christ." All right. That's it.

Big Teraphim News

Well, Maud Newton came to town! Here's a photo of us, why not? I got Maud to sign a copy of her new book ANCESTOR TROUBLE. So, I was reading about the Biblical story of Rachel and the teraphim in Maud's book, and then I picked up THE BOOKS OF JACOB by Olga Tokarczuk, which I am still reading, and I immediately came to a passage about Rachel and the teraphim! Does it mean something? I say Rachel and the teraphim is the big new trend to look out for in 2022.

Unconscionable

I hate to tell you, but the book I'm reading now has an owl in it. The book is all about the making of MIDNIGHT COWBOY. A NYC boutique called The Owl and the Pussycat is given the scantest possible attention as part of a long list of boutique names. That's how the owls are these days. They just sneak into the books through the back door. The owls aren't even trying anymore. It's unconscionable.

A Secret

As I am sure you must have guessed, Megan Abbott and I have been reading a dual autobiography of Ron and Clint Howard. Fairly late in the book, the story "An Occurence at Owl Creek Bridge" gets a shout-out. Now, does this means that the Ron/Clint Howard autobiography is a book with an owl in it? By my extremely lax standards, yes. But I will tell you people a secret. This time, I almost didn't bother to mention it. I came very close to sweeping this information under the rug! It was almost as if I could no longer remember why I chose to keep a meticulous record of every time I read a book with an owl in it.

The Satisfying Commas

Well, well. I see I have something in common with Nobel prizewinner Olga Tokarczuk: I wrote a novel called SWEET BANANAS, and she mentions bananas in THE BOOKS OF JACOB. Her phrase is "myrrh, oranges, bananas." I stared at it for a long time. Three words that go well together. Some credit may go to her translator Jennifer Croft, for all I know. The satisfying commas, for example.

I Wouldn't Even Mention It

Did you know I am serializing a novel on the "internet"? "Click" here if you don't believe me! You'll feel pretty dumb then! It's called SOUR BLUEBERRIES. It's sort of a companion piece to my previous limited-edition novel SWEET BANANAS, which is made of actual physical substances, and of which there are still a precious few copies left if you ACT NOW. I wouldn't even mention it, but as I was "posting" this morning, I noticed that there is an owl in today's installment (Part 10) of SOUR BLUEBERRIES. And you know what that means. Who are you?

Dramatic Moment

At a dramatic moment in her autobiography, June Havoc describes herself as being "owl-eyed and frightened." If you know me at all, which you don't, you know why I am compelled to tell you this (see previous "hyperlink"). But it's not much, is it? So as long as I am here, it has been too long since I was upset by a TV commercial. I've seen one recently in which Charlie the Tuna, the mascot of Starkist brand tuna products, boasts of having branched out into the chicken business. He announces a chicken product which has, quote, "the look and texture" of his tuna. Often have I pondered, listening to Charlie the Tuna's pitch, how it is a selling point.

I Watched the Hot Dog Being Built

I read a sentence I liked (see above) and emailed about it seperately to three friends: Megan, Sarah, and McNeil. Therefore I feel I have already written about it extensively and, as I no longer "blog" anymore, it hardly seems worth the effort to create "new content." As a result, I have chosen to cut-and-paste one of the emails below, the one I wrote to Sarah, to be precise, as it seemed to contain the most thrilling moments representing the richness of human experience. Here, then, is the email I composed to Sarah: "So, remember how, just six days ago, in the Sherman Oaks area, I told you an intriguing story of how Pen advised me 'Don't look!' when his dog pooped, but then we (you and I) looked out the window of your car and saw a large dog plainly pooping in our direction? You really made me laugh by comparing the experience to the movie SERENDIPITY. Ha ha ha! I'm still laughing. Anyway, so my friend Megan and I are in a book club of two where we read biographies and autobiographies of show biz types. Right now, we're on June Havoc, who performed in vaudeville as 'Dainty June.' You may remember her as a character in the biographical musical GYPSY, which was based on her family. None of this matters. Nor does it matter that her autobiography has a great first sentence: 'I watched the hot dog being built.' What matters is that the original (?) owner of the book was a Dane Blackburn, who dwelt at 211 E. 62nd Street in NYC. If found, he wished his book to be returned to him there [as indicated on the flyleaf]. Now here's the kicker! I looked at the address on Google Maps and they helpfully provide the name of the nearest restaurant. SERENDIPITY! Which is about something scribbled in the front of a book, right? The movie, I mean. And I think it's also named after that restaurant? You know, I've never seen the whole thing. I have attached photographic evidence for your examination." This concludes the email to Sarah. As an amazing postscript, to which Megan, Sarah, and McNeil have all been alerted, Eleanor Roosevelt lived at 211 E. 62nd Street from 1953-1958, as evidenced by this real estate video ("click" here). The book, however, came out in 1959, so my copy most likely did not pass through Mrs. Roosevelt's hands. In conclusion, though I brought my jotting book to Los Angeles, I will not be sharing my jottings on this occasion. That being said, I did have hot dogs with Elizabeth Ito, my brother, and Lee Durkee at a place out in Eagle Rock, which bears mentioning given the subject of Havoc's opening remarks.