Tuesday, December 26, 2006

The Twenty "Blog"mandments

It has come to our attention that there are twenty "blog"mandments, not fourteen, as previously reported. The pious among you will notice that there are twice as many "blog"mandments as there are "com"mandments. Obviously, this must stop. There can be no more "blog"mandments. This updated set is written in stone, so to speak, ha ha! And yet we may as well cry as laugh. Weep at the complexity of our modern times! It just doesn't make any sense that there are twenty things you need to know to be a good "blogger" and only ten to live a holy life. But that's the way it works! What can I tell you? Print these out, memorize them, and burn them. 1. Simply "click" on a highlighted word or phrase to be sent to a "link." 2. The internet is full of information. Check it out. 3. Check your favorite "blog" often or you might miss something. 4. It's okay for friends to disagree! 5. Remember: Cyclopes is the plural of Cyclops. 6. Life is not always about "blogs"! 7. Ask yourself before "blogging": How would Webern "blog"? 8. Get some Webern! 9. Use the word "blog" to create new words containing the word "blog." Think of the Smurfs and you will know what to do. 10. Support the arts! 11. It takes all kinds. 12. The depiction of a vice does not imply endorsement on the part of the depicter. 13. People are complicated. 14. It's good to blow off some steam! 15. Nothing is impossible with the powers of imagination. 16. It's fun to make new friends. 17. Wait to buy your calendar until it's marked down. 18. Always carry a pen. 19. Take your mind off things. 20. Check things out for yourself.